Photos of Jerry Jones Mid-Grope Are Not the Best Part of the Story

Categories: Sports

jerryjones.JPG
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A portion of one of the photos in question.

Earlier this morning, a series of photos hit Deadspin ostensibly showing Cowboys' owner Jerry Jones engaged in various stages of sexually suggestive conduct with two unidentified women.

In its initial post, Deadspin asked for help finding the photos' provenance. The apparent story behind the photos, posted a few hours later to the site, is unhinged.

The photos first appeared on the Internet in a tweet by @INFIN8SON, an account apparently belonging to a man named Frank Hoover:

Hoover is reported by Deadspin to be a hanger-on around the edges of the Dallas sports scene. He also claims, in the manifesto he published outlining the story behind the photos, to be the son of God, something he backs up by documenting a mark on his hand.

Hoover claims a man whom he had partnered with in various business ventures took the photos as part of a plot to extort Jones by spreading rumors of the photos to Cowboys players, so "eventually [Jones] would learn about [the photos] and try to stop [their] release."

The key to the story seems to be a 2005 screenplay penned by Hoover:

In 2005, I wrote a movie script about a white cowboy named BJJ (B Jerry Jones) and his black nemesis (Kevion). This script, which I will show you when we meet, describes events related to your extortion Jerry. This is the story I recalled on your birthday in 2013 leading me to send this. There are many more signs and information given to me by God which I am happy to share with you.

Hoover's whole deliriously batty screed, as well as a YouTube video where he claims to make two cars run a red light with his mind, are included below.

The Sins of Jerry Jones

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42 comments
PutzyMcBagful
PutzyMcBagful

Wow. At first I thought well this Frank fellow is yanking chains. But nobody puts in the amount of work he has put in just to yank chains. This guy is clearly severely unbalanced. Fortunately he isnt (yet?) dangerous. But if I'm Jerry Jones, I don't go anywhere without a couple of bodyguards. This guy is way off the deep end, and when you start believing you're the son of God, its easy to justify harming and even killing people.

frankhoover
frankhoover

This is the precursor to my final paper which links π to E = MC² unifying what Einstein could not in his day. He was close but I found the keys giving us infinite amounts of energy from weather patterns created by me (π = Son of God).

 Economic Value Equivalence Theory http://bit.ly/1m2abj4

frankhoover
frankhoover

Show me another human that can track and match their odometer at 888 to a license plate with 888 having probability of 1 in 108,434. This means you'd see this plate once every 1008.434 years. I did this with zero preparation, no participation by anyone else and relied only on my connection to God. God sends electrical signals to my legs and arms answering true/false questions like a boolean logic tree in computing.

I use this to track and match my odometer to the plate. In this case, I was 6 miles early on the odometer, but the plate came from Pennsylvania. That morning, I'd filmed this video using the Liberty Bell for an image: 



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=03K9cf9mjuo


888 Odometer Plate Matching:  http://youtu.be/B0SVeZfboTQ

Plate Statistics:  http://bit.ly/1oIBiCc

Mr.Grumpy
Mr.Grumpy

Nutjobs like Frank Hoover is why Dr. Higgs bristles at his namesake particle (the Higgs Boson) being called "the God particle." 


Sralopez
Sralopez

So wait is Wacko Frank Hoover still hiding from his ex psychotic pimp/ dealer/roommate cause he thinks his life is in danger and just wants Jerry to know that as the son of god, he needs to meet him to make sure he's protected? Tad too wacadoodle for me - this guy is clearly off the deep end and then some!

primi_timpano
primi_timpano topcommenter

Who in Dallas has not seen Jerry knee walking drunk, holding forth, ogling girls etc.?

GoingBoeing
GoingBoeing

As one Deadspin commenter noted, "Hoover might be nuts, but he still wouldn't have signed Tony Romo to an extension."

WhiteWhale
WhiteWhale

Stop the hate - I am sure those young women love Jerry for his mind.

CheeryBitch
CheeryBitch

zzzz on the pictures. It's well known that Jerry is a dirty old man. 

drjeff0001
drjeff0001

Jerry has put in a call to some guy named Dexter.  Stay tuned.

TheRuddSki
TheRuddSki topcommenter

You know he's reading this, so be nice.

yoyoyoyoyo
yoyoyoyoyo

In 2007 I was living in Austin at The Riata, a development that Jerry owned at the time.  He used to attend the annual Christmas party down there.  To get from the main clubhouse area where the party was to my apartment, there was a path, but it went a sort of circuitous route so I would just cut through at one point.  I wasn't really paying attention (I was pretty buzzed) and I almost walked into an old man messing around with a young woman. It was freaking Jerry!  Snuck out of the party with his whole family there.  Top 5 strangest thing that ever happened to me.  I guess I should have tried to take a picture. That way I could have either extorted someone or been able to communicate with God.  One or the other.  What a missed opportunity. 

Sharon_Moreanus
Sharon_Moreanus topcommenter

Doesn't look like his mistress from the Claridge.

everlastingphelps
everlastingphelps topcommenter

That is some primo crazy, and I'm a connoisseur of crazy.

Greg820
Greg820

Whatever Jerry does on his own time is his own damn business.  However, I do wish there was a recording of him going on a racist screed so that he would have to sell the team. . . . .

PutzyMcBagful
PutzyMcBagful

Coincidences happen every day, and theyre very easy to spot... After theyve occurred. You wanna prove something? Predict specific things in advance

PutzyMcBagful
PutzyMcBagful

If God truly loved you and considered you his son, he'd have you "accidentally" run into a truck containing a shipment of lithium.

PutzyMcBagful
PutzyMcBagful

It looks like he's also hoping Jerry can spot him some cash, since he did put his life on the line for the old perv, after all (and if I'm Taylor Swift, I have my lawyer drafting a petition for a protective order even as we speak).

rubbbrduky
rubbbrduky

@Greg820 Shit, I'll go on a racist rant, it's in my nature. My saying is " I don't hate you because your black, I hate you because I'm white "....LOL 88

PutzyMcBagful
PutzyMcBagful

I apologize for this comment and any others like it. Its cheap and wrong to call you names and put you down for a giggle from a few strangers on the internet. Wont happen again.

PutzyMcBagful
PutzyMcBagful

There are a lot of problems with this, the least of which is that the "video is unavailable". For example, you claim the odds of a 3 digit hit on a 6 character plate are 26*26*26*10*10*10. That would be true if you were looking for an exact match of all six (say, QRZ-888). But you're only looking for a match on the last 3 and the alpha characters don't matter, which means all those 26s are removed from the equation. Thus the odds are reduced to 10*10*10. One in a thousand. But again, those are the odds for any given car. Factor in how many cars you see in the course of three hours and the odds are actually very good that youll spot at least one every few hours.

frankhoover
frankhoover

@PutzyMcBagful you're correct its 1 in 1000 as I've calculated here: 

http://bit.ly/INFIN8SON_PlateStatistics

You also have to factor the motion of vehicles into the calculation as all plates aren't in motion at one time. This is based on the average commute time in TX of 33.20 minutes per day. See my stats for more examples.

PutzyMcBagful
PutzyMcBagful

I appreciate your providing links, I really do. As much as I would like to, though, I'm simply unable to spend any meaningful amount of time on this problem. So let me just close with this... bear with me, if you will.

The human mind is a marvelous thing. But sometimes its not good at all at being willing to recognize that something isn't working the way it should. Islamists who think nothing of beheading people. Serial killers. Schizophrenics. To name just a few. I can't say why the mind can't handle the truth. Maybe it cuts too deep psychologically and threatens our very existence, since everything we have ever known, and CAN ever know, must pass through it. We have to be able to feel like we have a reasonable grasp on reality or we've got, literally, nothing.

But hints that all is not well should be ignored at one's own peril.

How many people have you ever heard about who occupied the position of Son of God? Since you're a statistically minded guy, what are the chances-- purely statistically-- that you're really it? Incredible odds against it. Overwhelming. That isnt proof that you're not, but it should be a hint that MAYBE your mind is playing tricks instead. The more incredible, statistically improbable things you can count, the mor likely that MAYBE something should at least be investigated. Maybe you should see someone and let them have a look. After all, if you're not really the Son of God, wouldn't it seem really important to know that and get everything back in order? And if you are, wouldn't that be something, to have it confirmed definitively and bask in the adulation and admiration you would surely receive? What are the chances Taylor Swift would turn down the undisputed, universally true Son of God? I imagine she'd be all over you. Who wouldn't?

Anyway, think about it. And try to remember this if nothing else: if God ever tells you to hurt someone, for any reason, it ain't Him.

Best of luck to you.

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