It's a Contest! Photograph Mary Suhm at City Hall and Win a Fabulous* Prize

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City Hall needs to look like this next time Mary Suhm shows up.

I wanted you to know that I am still trying to find Mary Suhm at City Hall, and I need your help. Last week I made a movie based on my hunt for the former Dallas city manager, who is rumored still to be lurking somewhere in City Hall. It was a very bad movie.

See also:
My Search for Former City Manager Mary Suhm, Who's Apparently Lost in City Hall

But if you watched that movie all the way through -- and I don't think anyone did -- then you would know that I did not find her. In fact that was the big un-surprise ending.

But there were clues. First of all, if you go back and look at the movie, and frankly I can't recommend it, you might notice several things. When I asked people at City Hall where her new office was, they said she didn't have an office, but they didn't say she wasn't there, except for the one woman who told me she was on vacation.

She's retired. How can she be on vacation? If somebody thinks of her as being on vacation, doesn't that person also think of her as still working there?

Then if you were to focus on one particular scene -- and I wouldn't -- you would see the woman who finally comes out, tells me before I even ask that Suhm does not have an office at City Hall but also tells me that they let her come sit in a chair once in a while. I said in my column about it last week that I guessed that was a joke, but I didn't get it.

Aha! Now I think I do. It wasn't a joke. It was the truth!

Over the weekend, a person with inside knowledge of City Hall called me and told me it was his very strong impression that Suhm is still at City Hall almost full time but that she does not, indeed, have an office. Instead, she most decidedly and deliberately does not have an office, this person said. She floats from available space to available space, logs in and out of computer terminals wherever she may be, and uses her cell phone.

The whole point, he said, is for her not to have an identifiable numbered room or numbered telephone extension that some nosy reporter with a hat-cam on his head could find and come make a mockery of. I thought this whole explanation had a distinct ring of truth, but I should tell you I always think that about stuff that turns out later not to be true. So, the grain of salt.

At any rate, I am attempting to solve the riddle -- is she there or is she not? -- through conventional reportorial means, like the stuff they talk about at that Mayberry Convention at UNT every year. Open records searches, all that kind of stuff. For that, I refer you to another part of the film that I can't advise you go back and watch: A security officer and a lady both tell me that Suhm is inside a zone at City Hall where I am not allowed to go, because only people with badges can go there. Me, no badge.

So does that mean that Suhm does have a badge? Why would she have a badge if she no longer works for the city? So I have filed an public records request for a list of all persons to whom badges have been granted. I didn't want to have to look through too long a list, so I narrowed it down to people who have been granted badges this year. Suhm retired last year. Then I decided I didn't want to look through even that long a list, so I narrowed it down to people whose names begin with SUH.

If this goes the way most of my public records demands go at City Hall, they will delay giving me the list by sending a letter to the Texas attorney general arguing that state law specifically exempts from disclosure anything to do with persons whose names begin with SUH. That's enough to tie it up for the better part of a year.

Eventually some hard-working legal assistant in Austin will send them what I call the What-Are-You-Nuts? letter saying they have to give me the list, but by then the city hopes a bus will have run over me.

Anyway, it's in the hopper. I wanted you to know I'm on the job with that. In the meantime I have a better idea, and that's where you come in.

I am sponsoring an open public competition that I am calling the "Where's Mary Photo Contest." Prizes for the best time-and-date-stamped photos of Mary Suhm at City Hall will include a range of things from sincere gratitude to a place in history. Your mission is pretty straightforward: If you are ever at City Hall and see Mary Suhm, you are to whip out your phone or camera or whatever and squeeze off a couple good shots.

Just do it. Then, speaking as one who once had his hatcam savagely ripped from his head by Suhm, I would advise you to book it, make tracks, pick 'em up and put 'em down. You are within your legal rights to take pictures of her in a public place, but I would advise arguing legal rights with a pissed off Mary Suhm like I would advise arguing legal rights if a gorilla jumps out of its cage in front of you at the zoo. Legal rights later. Right now, feets don't fail me.

Of course we will post all the best Suhm shots right here, and, of course, you will be in the real movies soon after and never work another day in your life maybe. I specifically deny, reject and will flee from all responsibility, legal or illegal, for persons who fail to run fast enough and get caught by her, but don't let a little fine print stop you.

Where's Mary? Don't forget the time and date stamp, and show some background so we can see she's at City Hall. History is calling you. Calling and calling. Pick up the damn phone, will you?

*fabulous: of or like a fable; imaginary, fictitious or legendary. (Webster's New World College Dictionary)


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24 comments
rippinitup
rippinitup

Dallas Morning News covers the 800k Dallas had to pay back to HUD:


http://cityhallblog.dallasnews.com/2014/07/city-of-dallas-explains-why-its-repaid-more-than-810000-to-hud-over-the-last-year.html/


"Most of the funds in question – more than $625,000 – relate to the city’s Project Reconnect. That program – marked with scandal after, among other things, a supervisor was indicted on a charge of abusing her office – helps ex-convicts re-enter society."


"Given the broader scrutiny of the city’s housing department – HUD in December also accused the city of discriminatory affordable housing practices – questions remain about the city’s relationship with the federal agency."

“Is this just prudence?” Kingston said. “Is this a good faith measure to show HUD we are serious? Or is this an effort to make sure that there aren’t any more investigations?”

Go Kingston!!! Please clean up City Hall, the hard way!!! 

RTGolden1
RTGolden1 topcommenter

"...you are to whip out your phone or camera or whatever and squeeze off a couple good shots."

This is TX, that little 'or whatever' you threw in there could end up making you an accessory to a felony!

mavdog
mavdog topcommenter

A security officer and a lady both tell me that Suhm is inside a zone at City Hall where I am not allowed to go, because only people with badges can go there. Me, no badge.

"Badges? We ain't got no badges. We don't need no badges! I don't have to show you any stinkin' badges!"

holmantx
holmantx topcommenter

the answer:      Bullwinkle, bangs, in a moo-moo.








what do you see when you hear the screen door slam in the City Hall kitchen?

ThePosterFormerlyKnownasPaul
ThePosterFormerlyKnownasPaul topcommenter

If we are paying Ms. Suhm through the end of this year, should we be able to find out for what we are paying her?

qtzizzle
qtzizzle

I'm sticking with "bigbexardaddy", he knows what is going on:


"Killingworth told to resign May 7, 2013 during lunch hour with Ryan Evans, Suhm. Around130 in rage he started sending emails announcing retirement. He was expendable when his arrogance,incompetence finally got HUD's attention, including IG. Project Reconnect 2 indictments and hundreds of thousands ordered repaid so far. All programs all years being examined.

JK, Zavitkowsky, Evans, Suhm smug, over-confident, and got where they are by being smart enough and willing to do, say anything. Orgs and corps missing JK and worried about possible KarlZ, Evans departure are those enriched by the current no bid, no rfp, no competitive application system."

Which means Suhm is spending all her time going through all their programs with the HUD Inspector General. Sounds like fun, but thats what you have to do when you treat federal monies like your own personal piggy bank. 

HeywoodYBuzzoff
HeywoodYBuzzoff

Jimbo -- this is just plain stalking of that woman.  I am sure her former coworkers feel sorry for her and let her use unused cubicles to log so she can get to the internet to check out those businesses that 'advertise' in the back of your rag.  If you are going to be in 'It uses the lotion and puts it back in the basket mode', please stick with JWP or members of the Dallas City Council.

TheCredibleHulk
TheCredibleHulk topcommenter

An old-school throw-down?

C'mon, you know they need her there until the "AC-400" is fully operational.


rippinitup
rippinitup

When you read the article the numbers do not add up. Way too much money went to project reconnect based on what has been disclosed. There has to be more to the story given the wrongdoings of those indicted in Project Reconnect. Furthermore, the remaining difference between the 625k and the 810K also has not been fully explained/disclosed. There is some serious deceit here.........We need an absolute accounting of all the funds, line item by line item. 

maxim2
maxim2

You really are from South Dallas, arent you!

holmantx
holmantx topcommenter

@MaxNoDifference @holmantx

Picture Bullwinkle with a fall.


then bangs.


Maybe a glasses/nose/mustache disguise as she leaves the back door kitchen.


The babe HAS to be entering and exiting the place somehow.

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