Dewhurst Campaign's "The Ballad of Danny Goeb" Is Like a Blend of Ecstasy and Ipecac

Categories: Politics

OK, we need a new word here, people. Help us out. Something that describes a simultaneous feeling of great joy and nausea, laughing with delight while urping up a little bit at the same time. That word, whatever it might be, describes the reaction here at Unfair Park headquarters to this new online video from Team Dewhurst, the official YouTube channel for the Lieutenant Governor David Dewhurst's re-election committee.

In case you've not been following the political knife-fighting going on between Dewhurst and GOP runoff opponent state Senator Dan Patrick, "The Ballad of Danny Goeb" refers to the fact that Patrick, a former radio personality, changed his name in 2003.

In ads, Dewhurst's campaign suggests that Patrick changed his name to skip out on unpaid debts from an earlier bankruptcy, which would be pretty juicy stuff if it were true.

DanPatrickBucees.jpeg
Dan Patrick, at right. Allegedly.
Well, actually, it's pretty juicy even if it isn't, and if lies get Republicans tearing each other up with videos like "The Ballad of Danny Goeb," then SKUH-REW the facts.

Still, it behooves us to point out what the Austin American-Statesman/PolitiFact Texas website has to say about the claim:

On April 17, we rated as Pants on Fire another claim in Dewhurst's ad -- that Patrick changed his name to hide his debts. Patrick, who grew up as Dan Goeb, had gone by the name Dan Patrick as a broadcaster since the late 1970s but legally changed his name in 2003 in anticipation of running for public office -- more than a decade after his personal bankruptcy case ended. Based on that time gap and an absence of other factual back-up, we found Dewhurst's name-change statement incorrect and ridiculous.

So shame on you, David Dewhurst, for following it up with such an egregious video.

Please, sir, may we have another?

We expect so. During a debate with Dewhurst in Dallas today, some of the comments Dewhurst let fly caused Patrick to complain that the exchange "reminded me of a debate I had a long, long time ago -- in seventh grade."

Now, let's try for third grade, guys.

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24 comments
bvckvs
bvckvs topcommenter

The worst part isn't that the Republicans are lying and behaving badly.  It's that this is what Libertarian Republicans *want* from their representatives.

becoolerifyoudid
becoolerifyoudid

"Political language is designed to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable."

ThePosterFormerlyKnownasPaul
ThePosterFormerlyKnownasPaul topcommenter

Political campaigning is based upon two premises:


1) Tell lies so that they sound like the truth.

2) Tell lies often enough so that they are thought to be the truth.

Sotiredofitall
Sotiredofitall topcommenter

I'm just enjoying the entertainment value of these two knuckleheads going after each other.  


Now what's the name of the Democrat who's running?

P1Gunter
P1Gunter

If you were going to change your name, why would you choose the name of a spare ass sportscaster?

ozonelarryb
ozonelarryb

Joseph Conrad coined a phrase almost for this. The joy/horror watching car wrecks, CRASHCAR, etc.

Fascination of the abomination.

ozonelarryb
ozonelarryb

Reminiscent of Jesse Ventura rip in his debate that, "these two guys (tossing mud) are making me look great."

Pukehurst is a standard incumbent, thinks he's entitled turd. Patrick a dinosaur. Let em flay each other silly.

everlastingphelps
everlastingphelps topcommenter

It's pretty stupid in that changing your name doesn't get you out of the debts anyways.


Sec. 45.104. LIABILITIES AND RIGHTS UNAFFECTED. A change of name under this subchapter does not release a person from liability incurred in that person's previous name or defeat any right the person had in the person's previous name.


Sotiredofitall
Sotiredofitall topcommenter

@bvckvs  Please define "Libertarian Republicans" versus "Tea Party Republicans"

PatrickWilliams
PatrickWilliams moderator

@ozonelarryb  Hmm. Not sure that captures the cringe factor here, and a crashcar almost sounds like something useful. Maybe we're looking for something that captures the emotion of seeing your best friend take a shot to the sack. A cringe + laugh hybrid.


wcvemail
wcvemail

@ozonelarryb  
Laugh's on us citizens, because the winner WILL be in charge of our fates. Or "when elephants fight, ants tremble."

oakclifftownie
oakclifftownie

@everlastingphelps Knowing the law just gives you an advantage in court where it matters ..Not it the rough and tumble world of the unfair park comments section ...Or with Team Dewhuest who put this together .

Sotiredofitall
Sotiredofitall topcommenter

@PatrickWilliams  Can you legally change you name to "None Ofthe Above"     If so, I'm running next time around

ozonelarryb
ozonelarryb

Why I said almost.

Maybe, fwihtsebnm. Funny when it happens to someone else, but not me.

Or fowihtse. Funny only when...

Already have schadenfreude. Is that closer?

wcvemail
wcvemail

@PatrickWilliams @Sotiredofitall  
Great names and candidates in Tx history: "Bubbles Cash" (registered name), a former ecdysiast and Cowboys game streaker, was on the ballot in 1990. Yes, and mine was the sole Hopkins County vote for her, although I never got any campaign merch which would have been bubble-icious. 

PatrickWilliams
PatrickWilliams moderator

@Sotiredofitall  You remember a perennial candidate in Texas named Gene Kelly? You might have more success than you think.

wcvemail
wcvemail

@ozonelarryb 
Explicitly citing the morbid, untalked-about fascination of crashes to race fans, a punk band named themselves "Prison Rape Scenes" because they postulated that's the REAL reason normal people are drawn to prison movies, and they wanted to cash in on the draw.

Man, I've got the weird-historical-name-trivia fever today, think I'll go lay down, after washing carefully.

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