An Ice Storm is Headed Straight for Dallas. For Real This Time.

Categories: Weather

DayAfterTomorrowLiberty.jpg
An artist's rendering of what Dallas will look like the day after tomorrow.
Two weeks ago, Dallas breathed out a triumphant chuckle when the massive winter storm that promised to encase the city in ice and smother all signs of life arrived instead as a chilly but gentle rain. No way would the weather gods have the chutzpah to mess with the Big D, right?

Turns out, the weather cognoscenti weren't wrong about the coming icemageddon, just two weeks premature. Bearing down on Dallas right now is a storm the likes of which WFAA weather guru Pete Delkus has never seen before.

"The Metroplex is going to be entombed in ice," he warned today on Facebook. "It's just a question of how thick will it ultimately get."

The first storm arrives Thursday night. That, Delkus says, will be followed by a "McFarland Signature," which "effectively relocates the North Pole to the state of Kansas, and we will see temperatures dropping to levels we have not experienced in years by early next week.".

"Folks ... this is serious," Delkus concludes.

John Calipari believes it. The University of Kentucky basketball coach requested, probably in jest, that Saturday's matchup against Baylor at AT&T Stadium be postponed.

Of course, hyperbolic freakouts are Delkus' MO. The considerably more staid folks at the National Weather Service are hedging their bets more carefully, declaring an "increase in the likelihood of ice."

We're putting our money on Delkus in this instance. Why? Because this:

Jim Cantore is The Weather Channel's go-to guy for running around the country to cover hurricanes and the like. He doesn't waste his time with cold drizzles. Plus, according to AccuWeather.com, Dallas is being targeted by an angry cactus of ice, rain and snow.

AccuWeatherIceStorm.jpg

All that's left to be done is stock up on nonperishable food items and bottled water.

Head over the page for the official NWS (National Weather Service, not Not Work Safe) declaration of panic, complete with more capital letters than you can even imagine, and an explanation of how ice storms work.

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52 comments
Americano
Americano

If they can predict global warming 50 years from now, this weekend should be easy.  Just be sure to watch THEM (your weatherguy or gal of choice), because if you don't you will surely die.

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin topcommenter

The Weather Channel sent Jim Cantore to Dallas, we are all fucked.  Also, I cant wait for all the interviews on TV of stupid fucking motorists who get in wrecks, then get interviewed and claim, "Well they missed it last time, so I ignored the weather guys this time" 

michaelghoward78
michaelghoward78

An ex on the air meteorologist is saying the Texas Tech (TTU) model is only showing rain!!!!

pd97407
pd97407

kinda kool brings shivers down my spine thinking of this weather and hope it does not out do the 2010/2011 winter. 

lzippitydoo
lzippitydoo

If --- you believe these weather guys! How many times have they cried wolf -- this year alone?? The whole state should be shut down if you listen to them! Breaking news whenever you turn the TV on - just a fallout shelter mentality!

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin topcommenter

Steve McCauley is the best, and even though he doesnt work for WFAA anymore, Im glad he takes time out of his busy teaching and PHD schedule to give us his forecast.  Also its very nice that he allows Delkus and WFAA to use his forecasts.  Lets hope he stays in our area for a long time. 

Myrna.Minkoff-Katz
Myrna.Minkoff-Katz topcommenter

Myrna just noticed something:

"An artist's rendering of what Dallas will look like the day after tomorrow."

I didn't know they moved the Statue of Liberty to Dallas.

Myrna.Minkoff-Katz
Myrna.Minkoff-Katz topcommenter

Such a tsimmes!  You should live a winter in Brooklyn!

Sotiredofitall
Sotiredofitall topcommenter

Freeze long enough to kill the bugs then move on to spring and summer     

Alberto_Knox
Alberto_Knox

It seems like we used to have these ice storms every 3-4 years back in the '80s-'90s.  I moved here in '76 and remember Parkland Hospital was evacuated when the heat pumps couldn't keep up with the cold snap.  It has been ages since we had a good cold blast.  This will be good for weeding out some of the dimwit drivers who have been interbreeding the last decade or two

ThePosterFormerlyKnownasPaul
ThePosterFormerlyKnownasPaul topcommenter

Eric:  The weather advisory which you posted is for the Dallas Divide in COLORADO not the Metroplex.

J_A_
J_A_ topcommenter

This is Texas. I'll believe it when I see it.

dingo
dingo

A WINTER STORM WARNING MEANS SIGNIFICANT AMOUNTS OF SNOW... SLEET...AND ICE ARE EXPECTED OR OCCURRING. THIS WILL MAKE TRAVEL VERY HAZARDOUS OR IMPOSSIBLE.

Does this mean God put a squelch on the Uptown Player Theater's 'Adam and Steve'  opening night like the 'Right-Wing Catholics' predicted?


Montemalone
Montemalone topcommenter

Bottled water?

no.

Bottled bourbon. Yes

Bottled wine. Yes.

Bottled cider. Yes.

I even have some Oak Farms egg nog to dilute the Wild Turkey.

2DollaHolla
2DollaHolla

the cold weather wimps commin out of the woodwork on this one LMAO

jenne.barbour
jenne.barbour

It wasn't The Delkus.  It was McCauley.  I was already Facebook-shamed for misattribution.  Save yourself, Observer!

cmkinser
cmkinser

This looks more like a pickle of ice than a cactus of ice.  Rookie.

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin topcommenter

that model totally miss the last storm too, if you read ALL of that ex on the meteorologist posts.  way to cherry pick though, with no context.  Also, he said, that model must be thrown out of the forecast as it is the lone model calling only rain.  gooddaytoya

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin topcommenter

Um, the weather men are never wrong, Mother nature (a woman) just fucks it all up

ruddski
ruddski topcommenter

You're kidding, right?

markzero
markzero

@Myrna.Minkoff-Katz They build for this weather up there, though. Down here new house construction mostly is wood and paper with maybe a little insulation and some brick thrown in for appearance. 

gmit
gmit

@Alberto_Knox Funny how memory works, it was super fucking cold for days on end 3-4 years ago.

J_A_
J_A_ topcommenter

You mean you're not familiar with the San Juan mountains of Dallas?

leftocenter
leftocenter

@JustSaying @JaniceA

Janice, were you not around for the Super Bowlcicle?

JustSay...looking at the forcast for temps, yucky roads could last 4-5 days, followed by a very dirty car that doesn'wt get washed for weeks (my world)

JustSaying
JustSaying

@JaniceA Worst case scenario is 2 days of shitty roads followed by a trip to the carwash in shorts and flip flops on Saturday.

Dallasite1991
Dallasite1991

@jenne.barbour The exact same message is on both of their pages but if you look closely they say -sm at the end of the post. Misleading!


J_A_
J_A_ topcommenter

Definitely a pickle

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin topcommenter

yep super fucking cold for the super fucking bowl

ThePosterFormerlyKnownasPaul
ThePosterFormerlyKnownasPaul topcommenter

@gavin.cleaver @ThePosterFormerlyKnownasPaul  

Try this:

http://forecast.weather.gov/product.php?site=FWD&issuedby=FWD&product=WSW&format=CI&version=1&glossary=1

 

000 WWUS44 KFWD 042112 WSWFWD URGENT - WINTER WEATHER MESSAGE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE FORT WORTH TX 312 PM CST WED DEC 4 2013 TXZ091>093-100>103-115>117-129-050515- /O.UPG.KFWD.WS.A.0002.131205T1800Z-131207T0000Z/ /O.NEW.KFWD.WS.W.0002.131205T1800Z-131207T0000Z/ MONTAGUE-COOKE-GRAYSON-YOUNG-JACK-WISE-DENTON-STEPHENS-PALO PINTO- PARKER-EASTLAND- INCLUDING THE CITIES OF...BOWIE...NOCONA...GAINESVILLE... SHERMAN...DENISON...GRAHAM...OLNEY...JACKSBORO...DECATUR... BRIDGEPORT...DENTON...LEWISVILLE...FLOWER MOUND...THE COLONY... BRECKENRIDGE...MINERAL WELLS...WEATHERFORD...BRIAR...CISCO... EASTLAND...RANGER...GORMAN 312 PM CST WED DEC 4 2013 ...

WINTER STORM WARNING IN EFFECT FROM NOON THURSDAY TO 6 PM CST FRIDAY... THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN FORT WORTH HAS ISSUED A WINTER STORM WARNING FOR FREEZING RAIN AND SLEET...WHICH IS IN EFFECT FROM NOON THURSDAY TO 6 PM CST FRIDAY. THE WINTER STORM WATCH IS NO LONGER IN EFFECT. * 

TIMING...RAIN IS EXPECTED TO TRANSITION TO FREEZING RAIN AND SLEET THURSDAY AFTERNOON AND CONTINUE THROUGH FRIDAY. * 

MAIN IMPACT...ICE AND SLEET ACCUMULATIONS WILL CREATE HAZARDOUS TRAVEL CONDITIONS ON AREA ROADS...ESPECIALLY ON BRIDGES AND OVERPASSES. SIGNIFICANT TRAVEL IMPACTS ARE POSSIBLE DURING THIS EVENT...WHERE ICE ACCUMULATIONS MAY MAKE ROAD SURFACES IMPASSABLE AT TIMES THROUGH FRIDAY AFTERNOON. * 

OTHER IMPACTS...ICE ACCUMULATIONS MAY BRING DOWN TREES AND POWER LINES...AND COULD CAUSE POWER OUTAGES. * 

ACCUMULATION...FREEZING RAIN OR ICE ACCUMULATION OF UP TO ONE QUARTER INCH IS EXPECTED. SLEET ACCUMULATION OF UP TO ONE HALF INCH IS EXPECTED. PRECAUTIONARY/PREPAREDNESS ACTIONS... 

A WINTER STORM WARNING MEANS SIGNIFICANT AMOUNTS OF SNOW... SLEET...AND ICE ARE EXPECTED OR OCCURRING. THIS WILL MAKE TRAVEL VERY HAZARDOUS OR IMPOSSIBLE.

markzero
markzero

@ThePosterFormerlyKnownasPaul @gavin.cleaver


Or Dallas, Georgia. Imagine reading with that accent.

JustSaying
JustSaying

@jklwaddle @JustSaying @JaniceA I love it. I feel so old school when I put on my cold weather gear and hike to the gas station for beer and smokes. And a cup of gas station coffee for the hike back.

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