Joel Osteen and His Wife Will "Double Team" Dallas as Part of T.D. Jakes' MegaFest

JoelOsteen.jpeg
Joel Osteen, getting ready to double-team Dallas.
MegaFest, Bishop T.D. Jakes' massive annual gathering of evangelical Christians, is a pretty big deal, a $10 million production that draws 100,000 incredibly well-behaved visitors. The Dallas Convention & Visitors Bureau was so stoked when Jakes decided to move the festival to Dallas, it chipped in a half-million dollars.

But it wasn't clear exactly how big a deal MegaFest 2013 would be until Jakes and Joel Osteen announced in a recent video that the Houston megapastor will be lending his silver tongue and waxen Ken-doll good looks to the conference.

It's clear from their banter that both Jakes and Osteen are very excited about the chance to collaborate. The key exchange goes like this:

Osteen: When you called and invited us, I thought "What a great thing to be a part of," and I'm just inviting everybody to come along to Dallas and -- you know, you're always looking for an excuse to get together. Why not get together with other believers, get inspired in your faith, and have fun at the same time. There's no better people to hang out with than Bishop T.D. and first lady Serita. We're looking forward to it.

Jakes: I'll tell you what I'm looking forward to, your wife Victoria and you are going to double-team the "Woman Thou Art Loosed"

Maybe the phrase "double team" has different connotations than in the secular world. It certainly brings to mind unwelcome images that will probably help cement our place in hell.

Luckily for our eternal souls, we plan to be in Dallas on the weekend of August 29, when Jakes promises that he and Osteen will "tak[e] Dallas over for Jesus." We're ready.

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20 comments
kergo1spaceship
kergo1spaceship

this guy is not real....he's like Santa Claus or Sasquatch-right?

bifftannen
bifftannen

How many extra male prostitutes will be in the area for this?

TheCredibleHulk
TheCredibleHulk topcommenter

 "Woman, Thou Art Loosed" is a phrase that makes me cackle with delight.

And, it totally weirds me out to see a still picture of Osteen. Without those fluttery, blinky eyes, he just doesn't look quite right.

bealotcoolerifyoudid
bealotcoolerifyoudid

I didn't read the column, but anytime you get Joel Olsteen's wife and "double team" in a sentence you know it's Sexual Anarchy Agenda time.

bubb
bubb

As long as they don't care if stare at dem tittays, breasfeed in public all they want!

bubb
bubb

Star player in high school. Heisman trophy winner in college, not to mention other great achievements and championships. Takes the Broncos to the playoffs - their first appearance in like 7 years.

Then gets traded to the Jets who essentially bench him the entire season.

Then everyone starts saying he's a shitty player.

Poor fucker hasn't had a real chance to show what he can do.

bubb
bubb

The beauty of things like grilled cheese or peanut butter and jelly is the simplicity. 

 As much as I like exotic cheeses, artisan bread, etc. You just can't beat a couple of slices of good American cheese between two pieces of a good white standard loaf.

muddystick
muddystick

And taxpayer funds are going to help defray the costs of this religious confab?  (BTW, the last time Jakes talked about doing this in Dallas, the Comptroller asked the Attorney General for an opinion about the constitutionality of this taxpayer funding.  Jakes ultimately decided to move his get-together elsewhere out of Texas.  The Comptroller's query was thus moot and the AG never (to my knowledge) addressed the issue.)

So, where are all the TPers always up in our faces about the sanctity of our Constitution?  Quiet as a "church mouse."

But, boy, oh boy, let a Muslim just enter the CVB's front door with an idea like this and the TP would be having a hissy fit.

James080
James080 topcommenter

Let me see if I understand. The City of Dallas gives these folks half a million to come to town, praise Jesus,  pass the collection plate, and leave with several million more?

Montemalone
Montemalone topcommenter

This oughtta be as big as the Super Bowl or a republican convention.

For the local hookers, that is.



RTGolden1
RTGolden1 topcommenter

@bubb TD Jakes? or Osteen?  Been a Bronco fan all my life, never saw either of them in the orange and blue.

bubb
bubb

@muddystick If they are using taxes collected from Hotel and Motel stays, it's perfectly legal and constitutional. Those funds are to promote convention business and sounds like that's exactly what they will be used for.


It would be awesome to see a non-Christian religious gathering and see if they would get the money.

TheCredibleHulk
TheCredibleHulk topcommenter

@ThePosterFormerlyKnownasPaul @TheCredibleHulk 

They are . . . bright. That smile is measured in lumens.

muddystick
muddystick

@bubb @muddystick  Sorry, but your reply contains the operative word in why this use of "TAXES" is unconstitutional.  

It is not "Hotel and Motel" taxes that I was addressing anyway.  It is the state's Event Trust Fund that is at issue.  The city of Dallas applies to the Comptroller for reimbursement of certain costs related to big conventions, like cop overtime for instance.

No matter how you shake it out of the bag, it's TAXES being spent in support of a religious gathering.  Jakes and his fellow pulpiters should reimburse the city of Dallas for the increased expenditures! 

And Jakes, et al certainly should NOT receive ANY sort of taxpayer-funded support from whatever source. 

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