The Cowboys Select Mediocre Lineman, Awe-Inspiring Beard with First-Round Pick

Categories: Sports

The Morning News' David Moore put it gently when he wrote that the Cowboys' selection of Wisconson center Travis Frederick in the first round of the NFL draft is "not likely to satisfy [the] fan base."

The football cognoscenti had predicted he'd be a second or third round pick. Even Frederick himself has said he didn't expect to be taken on the first day of the draft. He's done an admirable job anchoring Wisonsin's stout offensive line, but he looked awful in NFL workouts and his 40-yard-dash time was "remarkably bad."

The Cowboys badly need to fix their offensive line, but the general consensus is that Frederick isn't the player to do it. Cue the angry rants about Jerry Jones' well-documented failures as an NFL GM.

But even the most cynical of fans can see a bright spot in the selection of Frederick. ESPN's Michael Smith explains:

And Frederick's beard is indeed righteous, a glorious tangle that's part Viking raider, part unkempt hipster. Even if Frederick turns out to be a mediocre pro, his facial hair could prove to be a tremendous asset. Don't be surprised if it has magical powers that, say, keep error-prone quarterbacks from late-game collapses. We'll be watching.

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You are all blind.  Don't you see that Jerruh is trying to appeal to the Oak Cliff hipster community by bringing in a hipster with a beard?  

Soon we'll hear all about how he doesn't like "mainstream" music, food, or anything.

Then, he'll leave the Cowboys and go pursue a career in wife-carrying because football is too "mainstream".


After last year thought it was pretty obvious the Cowboys needed massive "O" line help.  What does Jerry do?  Picks 1 offensive lineman, then picks a TE, a project WR and RB.  Expect to see Romo running for his life again.


Babysitting a19 year old


Even Jerry with all his stammering had a  hard time selling this one. Why does he always trade down? I smell another .500 year, no playoffs and another fired head coach who never had a chance. Jerry's just a jock sniffer with a lot of money.


shante carver. quincy carter. travis frederick.


I used to think Jerry was a good Owner and terrible GM.  However, any Owner that wouldn't fire such a poor GM is actually a terrible Owner.  If this were the Middle Ages, his sons would have already locked him in a dungeon and taken the crown for the good of the Kingdom.


Gil LeBreton put it best best yesterday in his tweet

Honk if you wish Jerry Jones was in your fantasy league, where of course he’d be The Guy Who Makes 100 Trades And Finishes 10th Every Year

Sotiredofitall topcommenter

@ChrisYu Yep - Seen all of this before and will see it again   Have to quit giving time to reruns.

primi_timpano topcommenter

Richard III? His only son died about year before Richard. He was 11.

Myrna.Minkoff-Katz topcommenter

@primi_timpano Right.  It's the reverse.  Richard III had his two nephews locked in the Tower, and he ruled for only two years.

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