43 Things You Won't Find in the George W. Bush Library

Thumbnail image for BushPresidentialCenter.jpg
The most interesting of the three institutions that comprise the sprawling George W. Bush Presidential Center at SMU is the museum, which is filled with artifacts from the former president's life. There's the bullhorn he used to address first responders from the rubble of Ground Zero in 2001, the windbreaker he wore during a secret Thanksgiving trip to Baghdad, a voting booth from Sumter County, Florida. There's even Decision Points Theater, basically a role playing game in which you get to play Bush as he decides whether to send federal help to New Orleans or invade Iraq.

See also:
- Everything You Need to Know About the Bush Center/Library/Theater/Museum/Thing
- Your George W. Bush Presidential Center Live Stream and Open Thread

But while curators strove to include both the successes and controversies, the collection is far from encyclopedic. Below is a list of things without which the museum will be woefully incomplete.

1. "Awesome Speech Your Holiness": A Video Installation

2. Dick Cheney's Original Heart

3. "Mission Accomplished!" Banner

4. A Wall That Looks Deceivingly Door-Like

5. A Ball Pit

6. A Glimpse into Vladimir Putin's Soul

7. A Sideways Elevator

8. Virtual WMD Locator

9. This List of Bushisms

10. His Complete Mountain Biking Wardrobe

11. Miniature Replica of Post-Katrina Superdome

12. The Spittle-Covered Pretzel That Nearly Made Cheney President

13. Osama bin Laden

14. Axis of Evil Carousel

15. A Balanced Budget

Abu-ghraib-leash.jpg
"Right this way, sir."
16. A Tour Guide Named Lynndie

17. A Man Cave

18. This Authentic Chinese Wardrobe

19. Barney The Dog, Post-Taxidermist

20. Barbara Bush, Pre-Taxidermist

clearinbrush_opt.jpg
21. Uncleared Brush

22. John Ashcroft Karaoke

23. Definition of "Misunderestimate"

24. A Decent Cocktail

25. Crocodile Mile

26. The Shoe

27. Lipstick-Stained Napkin with Angela Merkel's Number

28. A Visit from the Goon Squad

29. Interactive Water-Boarding Exhibit, Brought to You by Evian

30. Complimentary Fro-Yo

31. Decision Points Theater Presents: Hello, Dolly!

bushart_opt.jpg
via
32. His Oddly Competent Art

33. The Buffalo Wild West Wing Sports Book and Lounge

34. Frank Caliendo Five Nights a Week. (Not Expected Until Early 2014).

35. Laser Tag

36. Aaron Sorkin Scribbling Frantically

37. Enemy Combatants versus American Gladiators

38. W-Less Keyboards

39. Bush's Cheerleading Uniform

40. Bush's Air National Guard Uniform

41. One Unused Vietnam Uniform, Still Freshly Starched

42. The Pet Goat

43. Hammered Al Gore Wandering Around the Fake Oval Office Muttering, "It Could Have Been Me. It Could Have Been Me."


My Voice Nation Help
82 comments
Ken Shipley
Ken Shipley

I guess someone had to rain on George Bushes's parade...

halldecker
halldecker

President GHWB put the event into perspective; I'd love to know what Jr. said to him about them red socks!!!

Let's not make more out of this than what it deserves. Jr. can't afford to keep the junk at U-ST0R-IT.

    Delete

Americano
Americano

GWB drives liberals crazy, and that makes me smile.

Andrew Davis
Andrew Davis

Will they find WMD's in there (LOL) They sure were not in Iraq

Myrna.Minkoff-Katz
Myrna.Minkoff-Katz topcommenter

Bush was born in Connecticut, educated at elite Andover, and Yale.  So how did he get that mush-mouth of his?

Myrna.Minkoff-Katz
Myrna.Minkoff-Katz topcommenter

Eric, you sly puss.  You got this idea from my comments.

rke
rke

Love the passive- aggressive humor of the wannabe hip.

whocareswhatithink
whocareswhatithink

#8......Hint - take a look at Syria

(I get its supoose to be a joke, but considering the current loss and war currently going on in many parts of the world with the threat of chemical war fare - its pretty bad timing. Dont take my word for it, ask Chuck Hagel, the current secretary of Defense)

Russ Coffman
Russ Coffman

44. My Schwab statement, showing a 62% loss (since recovered).

Daniel
Daniel

This should be chiseled in marble at the entrance:

"One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures."— George W. Bush, quoted in U.S. News & World Report, Jan. 3, 2000

kergo1spaceship
kergo1spaceship

I know what you won't find at the Bush opening this weekend (and this is just an observation).......the "typical" Dallas banquet waiter-understand? 

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin topcommenter

damn, glad these people werent on the live stream page, they would have been real offended and would have made my responses seem lame

Tim Benoit
Tim Benoit

1 thing you won't find at the DO offices: a writer with any real accomplishment or credibility.

Daniel
Daniel

Dick Cheney once had a heart? Who knew?

joe.tone
joe.tone moderator

@Americano I'm pretty liberal, and I can say honestly that he DROVE me crazy, but I now love everything about him: humble, self-effacing, sweet, and he can paint the fuck out of a dog. I want to play golf with him and get trashed and give him every putt inside of nine feet.

scottindallas
scottindallas topcommenter

@Americano he makes honest observers crazy, and if that makes you smile, your a pathologically demented person.  Most are upset at his cavalier initiation of war, the destruction of a whole country on what he should have know were utter lies.  That's represents a vast waste of our resources.  You're such an idiot, by analogy, you'd stick an icepick on your girlfriend's eye, just cause it would piss off liberals.  You're no American patriot, you don't give a shit about this country--please, you traitor, change your name. 

Americano
Americano

@Myrna.Minkoff-Katz  

My Mother was born in Indianapolis and moved here as a teenager.  She has a bigger Texas accent than anyone I know.  I think it's called "growing up here".

Daniel
Daniel

@Myrna.Minkoff-Katz Myrna, I don't know the exact timeline, but Bush did spend a goodly portion of his upbringing in Midland.

Myrna.Minkoff-Katz
Myrna.Minkoff-Katz topcommenter

And don't say I'm mocking Texas.  Lloyd Bentsen was born and raised here and went to UT, and he had a sublime command of the English language.

scottindallas
scottindallas topcommenter

@whocareswhatithink you mean the country where we're arming the terrorists, and then blame the ruler for the civil disruptions caused by the terrorists?  Syria is a 80's Afghanistan or more recent Libya redux.  You'd think our {in}security complex would learn their lessons.  You'd think you would too.  Assad's not blowing up cars, killing cops--9 were shot the first day of "peaceful" protests.  We're working with the Turks, The Saudis, and the GCC to arm Terrorists. 

Americano
Americano

@joe.tone

Well, I'm a conservative, and I didn't always agree with him.  In fact I didn't vote for him in his last election.  However, I used to manage a restaurant in the Park Cities and had occasion to interact with him and he is a decent person.  He treats everyone with respect, even those who can do nothing for him.

Americano
Americano

@scottindallas

Smiling!  Not an out and out laugh mind you, but the wry smile I get when my 7 yr throws a fit.

scottindallas
scottindallas topcommenter

@Myrna.Minkoff-Katz none compare to Barbara Jordan.  I didn't know you'd posted this, made the BJ comment before seeing your link Observist

whocareswhatithink
whocareswhatithink

@scottindallas @whocareswhatithink Thats a nice rant. Albeit a little misplaced. I dont remember sticking up for anyside only pointing out WMD's are currently being used in Syria.... according to #8, becuase they said they would not find them and regardless, people are dying by them. And yes, I'm well aware of the $10billion arms deal in the middle east.

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin topcommenter

@Myrna.Minkoff-Katz It was all in love myrna,  you know I dont hate you, but you are like that pesky lil sister, just annoying sometimes

Americano
Americano

@CornyDoggy

No, he was nice to everyone every time he came in.  We got a lot of wealthy and famous people there, and you can't say that about all of them.  Think what you want about him and so will I.

CornyDoggy
CornyDoggy

@Americano

He was a nice guy to you at your restaurant for a few seconds?  Your evaluation stops there?

Daniel
Daniel

@Americano @scottindallas Most liberals are so deeply demented, they even question whether Bush was born in this country. They've gone off the rails!

Now Trending

Dallas Concert Tickets

From the Vault

 

General

Loading...