Public Urination is Perfectly Legal in University Park, Probably Won't be after Tuesday

Categories: Crime, News

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Here's something they don't tell you when you stroll into University Park: You're perfectly welcome to piss or shit wherever you please. That's the law, anyways. The city apparently lacks an ordinance, standard among modern municipalities, banning public urination or defecation.

It's an omission city officials can no longer ignore, which is why the City Council will consider a measure on Tuesday that would make relieving oneself alfresco a misdemeanor subject to a $200 fine.

City spokesman Steve Mace told WFAA that UP police occasionally come upon people -- construction workers and college kids mainly -- availing themselves of a handy tree or bush. But it was only several weeks ago, when officers caught individual in flagrante delicto and realized they had no authority to arrest him or issue a citation, that they finally concluded something needed to change.

WFAA interviewed a handful of residents, all of whom were duly shocked. Whether they were more upset by UP's legal loophole or the thought that people would go to the bathroom outside is hard to tell.

"It's just etiquette to clean up after your dog, so I can't imagine why a human can go use the bathroom in somebody's yard," resident Kenny Huff told the station.

It's obviously been a long time since he was in college.


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10 comments
tagkev1
tagkev1

well..that pisses me off

vampars
vampars

I've been saying it ever since my days at U.P. Elementary's rival Armstrong: U.P., I P., we all P. on U. P.

alteredjustice
alteredjustice

I don't see why U can't P in UP. Just seems natural.

monstruss
monstruss

ok guys, fess up: who is shitting on Kenny Huff''s yard in the middle of the night? 

observist
observist topcommenter

This pisses me off.

ChrisYu
ChrisYu

i demand all charges against me dropped immediately.

Montemalone
Montemalone topcommenter

Huh?

Residents of UP shit on Dallasites for a living. 

libtardshit
libtardshit

Hey shitface, professional assholes like Jim Schitze and all the other so-called "journalists" at the observer shit on the Park Cities (and all suburbs) all the time.

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