Sorry, DMN, That Really Was the Worst National Anthem Ever

WorstAnthemEver.jpg
Deadspin

There are some things that are simply indefensible. One of those things is 11-year-old Harper Gruzins' rendition of the "Star-Spangled Banner" at Saturday's FC Dallas-L.A. Galaxy soccer match called out by Deadspin.

The Morning News didn't think so. Nancy Churnin wrote an indignant counter-post this afternoon: "Deadspin dead 'off' in attacking 11-year-old's rendition of the National Anthem."

So I listened to her rendition and I was flabbergasted by the vitriol. First, if you hate the way she sang the song that much, why are you posting it and encouraging readers to listen over and over? Just to make fun of her? Second, Deadspin compares this "worst ever" performance to renditions by Steven Tyler and Roseanne. Remember, they are adults, and they tampered with the song, with Roseanne grabbling her crotch with the misguided idea that everyone would think that was funny. Harper was off key, but she sang the song proudly, enunciating all the words and putting everything she had into it.


She concludes: "Although it's a funny thing, if you don't humiliate and tear those dreamers down, some of them may actually grow into their dreams. Seems worth the chance of refraining from attacks like this."

We wish Harper Gruzins the best. Maybe she just had an off night, but whose dreams are we talking about here? I'm sure there are millions of 11-year-olds who dream of being pop stars and think they can sing really well, but does that mean they should belt out the national anthem in front of a few million people? Does that mean she needs a manager and a promotional website?

That's where the parents should step in. There's a big difference between encouraging a child to dream and inflating their ego to unreasonable proportions, either through overindulgence of childish whims or through the parents' vicarious pursuit of glory.


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73 comments
mattchappel
mattchappel

And the people who are defending this girl because of her age should remember that the most members in the Jackson 5 were under 13 when they hit the height of their success... And just in case you don't remember, they COULD SING.

mattchappel
mattchappel

Someone should tell this to Taylor Swift. She can't sing at all yet she's got a record deal, several grammys, and a few million dollars.Horrible singers should be called out, not encouraged.

rufuslevin
rufuslevin

barney frank has a huge lisp, and is totally gay....yet he was elected to Congress.

this kid just missed a few notes...but no lisp, she isn't gay, and with any luck she has a better chance of being a good citizen than bawarny ever could.

 

then their is Obama...who totally ignores the National Anthem of the USA...he loves the chanting of muslim prayer calls much more than any other "music".

1dailyreader
1dailyreader

No excuses for this girl.  I saw her being interviewed on one of the local stations last night and at the end of the interview, she started out singing "Amazing Grace"....it was realllllly bad.

vbuss
vbuss

Another Jessica Simpson in the making

Angrywhiteguy
Angrywhiteguy

I was there.

Without a doubt, no comparison, in all my years..... this was the single worst rendition of our national anthem that I've ever been subjected to. Her vocal talent, her "rendition" or artistic skill and the time it took her to sing the damn song.....frankly everything that could possibly be bad....was.

 

Yeah, she's eleven....but who in the hell made the decision that she should sing? This kid has no business humming the national anthem, much less trying to sing. I truly feel sorry for the kid, but my Lord, she has to know she cant carry a tune....and so do her parents.

 

This is two games in a row at FC Dallas stadium that they've dragged out someone who sings worse than me.

 

Somebody at FC Dallas needs to be reassigned.

PerryMoore
PerryMoore

Call me a contrarian, but isn't this an 11 year old girl, and aren't you folks supposed to be adults? Perhaps we bloggers should all take turns slapping this presumptuous little Christian in the face, but as Mr. Nicholson states, "There are some things that are simply indefensible." I, for one, place bullies in that group. Young Mr. Nicholson gets a zero for today's assignment.

MissMacy
MissMacy

The kid sucked. Somebody should encourage her to sing in the shower and let the rest of us have some peace.

Mervis
Mervis

Yo, a little pitchy dude!

wrw22
wrw22

"We wish Harper Gruzins the best."Yeah that really comes through in your post.  This entry just reeks of wishing someone the best.  (By the way, you forgot to tell that kid to go kill herself).

Scruffygeist
Scruffygeist

Did anyone else think of the Simpsons episode where they timed how long the anthem was at a baseball game?

 

If she's old enough to be a "singer/songwriter" and perform in a public venue, she's old enough to realize or be told not to trick it up. And if you're going to trick it up, hit the notes.

 

It really was the worst anthem ever in the "didn't forget the lyrics" category.

ceepee
ceepee

What is "grabbling"? 

Cliffhanger
Cliffhanger

The real problem is that we have an unsingable national anthem.

EastDallasDad
EastDallasDad

Turrible!

 

It reminds me of when my sister and cousin put on an impromptu concert at my great-grandmother's nursing home. One of the ladies told them, "You need to go home and practice."

 

Creating unrealistic expectations for kids by telling them they're great when they are awful is just as bad as telling them they're worthless and will never accomplish anything. I taught for over a decade and that's why we have classrooms full of kids that think they don't need to study because they're going to be in the NBA when they didn't even make the school team and others that think they're going to be a recording artist and can't carry a tune in a bucket.

Thelisma.Partridge
Thelisma.Partridge

I blame American Idol and all other contrived reality/talent TV shows for distorting this poor girl's view.

wilson
wilson

just found it, my god that was awful

MushMouth1
MushMouth1

Just the usual parochial crap from DMN with the added bonus of "what about the children"? Yes it was that bad. Want to know how we end up with adults who think the world owes them something and can't cope with adversity? Starts right there.

GuitarPlayer
GuitarPlayer

Deadspin is a bunch of dicks. To compare her to Rosanne is ignorant. And making fun of an 11- year old putting herself out there is pure Douchebaggery. Eric, believe me, as a parent of 3 kids I can tell you that if they don't what this they won't do it. Be a parent and figure that shit out before you give your opinions. ...........and if it was up to me Hendrix's version would be the one played at every sporting event......of course I am a little bias..... 

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin topcommenter

so what is the connection that Nancy Churnin has to this little girl or her family.  that is an indefensible anthem.  Personally id be fine if we just made the anthem instrumental everytime

honey
honey

Not the worst, but hardly good. Also, when will singers stop saying "perOlous" in stead of "perilous"?

TitusGroan
TitusGroan

A common problem with the national anthem is people think they have to go over the top.  Just sing it as the composer wrote it.

ChrisYu
ChrisYu

she should be grounded. no television and no allowance for a week.

Shayla N. Grimsley
Shayla N. Grimsley

wow.. i wouldn't say she was terrible.. but just really damn bad!

Joy Henson
Joy Henson

i blame Nickelodeon-every show is some youth singing badly

Nickster
Nickster

Just awful.  My favorite part of the video was watching people's reactions to her yodeling.

rufuslevin
rufuslevin

 @Myrna.Minkoff-Katz you must be a retarded slut to have a sick need to insult a little kid....go home and play with yourself, Mryna...and stop minkoffing all the katz

BendYerFender
BendYerFender

 @PerryMoore She is 11. And no, we're not supposed to be adults. Kids can get online,too Perry.

Furthermore, are you suggesting that we lie to her and tell her she's good?She's a bad singer as of now. Get over it.

Myrna.Minkoff-Katz
Myrna.Minkoff-Katz topcommenter

 @ceepee It's what Mitt the Twit does when he goes out to shake hands: "Greet the rabble".

Sotiredofitall
Sotiredofitall topcommenter

And others who think they're gonna be the next Zuckerberg 20 something billionaire.

observist
observist

 @GuitarPlayer "I can tell you that If they don't what this they won't do it" 

 

I am a parent and I still can't figure out that shit you just wrote.

ceepee
ceepee

 @GuitarPlayer So sad for the future- you've actually bred and are bringing up children. Your whole post is incomprehensible. 

planecrazy
planecrazy

 @GuitarPlayer  @LOLOL

 I know one connection you're missing.  The one between your brain and rational thought.  I'm with ceepee.  You actually procreated and now were destined to suffer the consequence.

GuitarPlayer
GuitarPlayer

 @LOLOL You don't know what connections I have, that's the funniest thing about your comment.

LOLOL
LOLOL

 @GuitarPlayer  Thank god morons like you don't have connections like her parents. Gauaranteed thats how she got the spot over someone who probably could sing 10x BETTER then this worthless rendition. Parents need to get off their high horse and give some tough love.

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