Ralph Hall Demands to Know What NOAA Spends on Magicians, Comedians, Mind Readers

Categories: Politics

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Rep. Ralph Hall finally found his General Services Administration-style confab scandal. No, it doesn't involve EPA employees playing a blindfolded game of Crucify the Energy Executive during a conference at The Venetian. But it's the next best thing: the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, with its heretical climate change studies. And it involves a magician, sort of.

When Hall heard that NOAA sought quotes for a motivational speaker to headline its upcoming conference, someone capable of "creating a unique model of translating magic and principles of the psychology of magic, magic tools, techniques and experiences into a method of teaching leadership," Congress' eldest statesman and fiscal-responsibility standard bearer acted to head off another boondoggle. Was the agency charged with monitoring the oceans and the weather spending taxpayer dollars to throw the equivalent of a six-year old's birthday party year after year?

On Thursday, Hall demanded to know exactly what it spends per annum on conjurers, prestidigitators, comedians and mind readers.

"As the Federal government continues to burden American taxpayers with trillion-dollar deficits and NOAA struggles to meet critical weather forecasting missions to protect lives and property, this type of ridiculous and wasteful spending is simply unacceptable," he chided.

The NOAA official charged with planning the one-day conference told the publication Government Executive that the gathering was intended to "train potential" managers in, among other things, "working with Congress."

Lesson One: Completed.


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10 comments
Guest
Guest

Way to go, Ralph. Really looking out for what's important.

Max from the Sandspit
Max from the Sandspit

Rats. We were praying that they'd find a witch doctor that could make John Bryson, Jane Lubchenco, EDF and Dale Jones dissapear forever.

billmarvel
billmarvel

I'm all for NOAA and what it does. But motivational speakers are the greatest scam since snake-oil elixirs and unclaimed fortunes in Nigeria.  

Cliffson
Cliffson

Ralph Hall is one of the oldest living comedians, his shtick as a legislator has been a side-splitter for decades. So why would he turn on his own kind now?

Ed D.
Ed D.

I bet if NOAA tried to hire motivational speaker Sarah Palin (for $75,000 plus first-class airfare, deluxe hotel accommodations, chauffeur to and from event with SUV, and two bottled waters with bendy straws) we would not be hearing these howls of indignation from Ralph Hall.

Scruffygeist
Scruffygeist

Perfect opportunity for a picture of Gob Bluth.

Now it's ruined.

MattL1
MattL1

Thank you, Ralph Hall. Without your leadership, I wouldn't have known how much I don't care about this.

Guest
Guest

So a guy who voted to add at least $2 billion to the deficit (so far) is going to balance the budget by cutting a few thousand in wasteful spending at NOAA.

Sounds like a solid plan.

Guest
Guest

As long as any woman who performs is paid less than a man would have been, I'm certain Ralph would be in favor.

Guest
Guest

And your comment was the perfect opportunity for Brantley to post in response:

"I've made a huge mistake"

Also now ruined.

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