The Upside of Rick Perry's Embarrassing Gaffes: Like, Everyone Wants Him to "Adios, Mofo"

Categories: Get Off My Lawn

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Star-Telegram Washington bureau reporter Maria Recio has a story today asking various Texas politicos how much Governor Rick Perry has embarrassed the Lone Star State. The answers don't vary a lot.

If this were a story about fishing, some people would have their hands out about shoulder width apart and others would have them stretched out all the way.

The Dallas Morning News has a reprint of it deep inside today's paper under the slightly misleading headline, "Democrats fear Perry is embarrassing Texas."

Oh, just Democrats? Well so what, right? But if you read to the end of the piece, the most caustic assessment comes from a Republican:

One independent Austin political operative who's close to many top Texas Republicans said flatly: "His political career is over." But that person would not speak for attribution because he feared fallout from the governor, whose current term doesn't end until 2014.

"Everybody from Texas has pride and stature," he said. "He looked like an absolute reject; it's embarrassing. Everybody's embarrassed as a Texan."

Wow. That's from a Republican? Makes you wonder what kind of quote Recio would have obtained had she been able to get to Perry's wife.

But look: Buried in the same story are themes that may promise better times ahead for our fair state, specifically because Perry's political career may crater after this debacle. Maybe Perry won't have Texas to kick around anymore.

For example, Recio takes note of the fact that Texas House Speaker Joe Straus, a San Antonio Republican, has been speaking out halfway courageously -- well, in a non-cowardly fashion, let's say -- about Perry's totally wacko Tea Party attack on the state's top research institutions.

When I was working on our story about Perry's "Texas Miracle" -- Perry was suggesting on the campaign trail that he's the reason the Texas economy has been good for 40 years -- his assault on higher education was something that cropped up a lot when I talked to Republicans. Some of them were people who had worked on rebuilding the state's economy after the disastrous collapse of the late 1980s. They said they did it with big tax hikes, massive support for public schools and strong subsidies to higher education, especially at research institutions. We drew some of the high-tech stuff here from Northern California in part by drawing a picture of ourselves that wasn't all yahoos, racists and homophobes.

Some of those Republicans I talked to were aghast at Perry's plan to pass a law making it illegal for universities to give faculty members tenure based on research accomplishments. People who have any kind of familiarity with the world of academic research know that a law like that would turn all of the state's top researchers into refugees.

The professors would be riding out of Texas on top of boxcars with their books and beakers wrapped in bandanas hanging from poles over their shoulders. Perry's plan is just crazy crazy crazy.

But here's the other thing. Most of the people I talked to were afraid to be quoted. They saw Perry as this frightening malevolent demagogue with an army of Tea Partiers marching with him.

So now maybe that is going to change. Now he's the oops guy. It's hard to be afraid of an oops guy. Something about it. His own self-deprecating humor afterward sort of helped. Sort of didn't. If you ran into him at a party, you'd still be tempted to say, "Hey, Rick, do your oops thing for us, willya?"

You know. You'd want him to do the whole repertoire.

"Now do 'Adios, mofo.'"

"Rick, can you still do, 'Was it before he was before the social programs?'"

But then you'd have to worry he might get on a roll, and you might have to rein him in.

"No, Rick. Rick. That's all. No, don't do the N-word-head Rock thing, Rick. That's not a good one."

If I were Perry, I know what I would say to everybody. I'd say, "Adios, mofo" and go back out hunting with my dog at the rock place.

Maybe it's time we all stop stretching our hands out as big as we can go and just cross our fingers behind our backs instead.


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27 comments
Bettyculbreath
Bettyculbreath

He wrote about Perry not Obama how can you people be so twisted about Obama.Some of you have Obama on the brain.Dam how do you sleep or eat thinking about that ,Handsome inteligent,fine elected Balck& White blooded man.

Mike
Mike

If he ran for governor tomorrow against any Democratic candidate, Rick Perry would mop the floor with him or her. Not just defeat, mop the floor. That is the only reality that matters on Texans being embarrassed.

Chris Danger
Chris Danger

Wow...Slick Rick is even hated by his own party, whod'a thunk it? What im more embarassed by besides this idiot is members of congress from our own state not standing up to this guy and reigning him in..Here's hoping he'll receive a serious hide-tanning in these next couple of months in the primaries that'll shut him down and be the beginning of the end of his reign of terror in texas

Robert
Robert

Going hunting with a good dog sounds terrific. Cleaning out a pretentious East Dallas urban chicken coop does not.

I get the feeling that Schutze's inside sources and movers & shakers have remained motionless the past 20 years.

Lee
Lee

"Ding, dong the witch is dead, the wicked witch is dead" Good bye Rick Perry

Rooster
Rooster

I realize I'm starting to sound like a broken record, but I'm still dumbfounded.

For the life of me, I can't figure out how this clown got serious consideration for the United States presidency...

Jay
Jay

Fish or fowl?  OK genius........identify ten professional politicians who are not a total embarrassment to anyone with anything approaching a normal range IQ.

SteveT
SteveT

When Rick Perry entered the race for Republican nominee for President, I wrote the following to my family, some of whom live in Minnesota: 

Perry promptly demonstrated why he is not presidential material by calling the Federal Reserve’s actions (specifically printing money) “treasonous” and implying Ben Bernanke would (and should) be strung up by vigilantes if he came to Texas.  It seems that poor Ben is just desperately trying to find a way to sustain the status quo we’ve come to know over the past 60 years; apparently something many Americans believe is possible.  But deliberately trying to ruin the country?  Anyway, it’s too hot for lynching down here these days, and the lakes are too low for dunkin’.  

Ah, Perry is “W” without the encumbrance of intellect; Reagan without the charm, polish, verbal dexterity, and dumb luck; a “good-looking rascal” and Marlboro Man for Jesus that believes shrinking the Government and allowing people more freedom (especially large corporations—he and Romney agree on that one), including the freedom to carry side-arms so they can shoot coyotes that attack their dogs (apparently a major problem facing Americans—who knew?) will create jobs. Well, maybe it will--for gun makers/dealers and animal undertakers. O wait, disposing of dead coyotes is currently the state’s job; better get ready for an avalanche of dead varmints clogging neighborhood streets and sidewalks across the country if Perry is elected President.   What a disappointment politics is turning out to be.  I haven’t heard one phrase from any of the Republican aspirants aimed at addressing our real problems--the major overextension (both ecological and economic) of not just our country but all developed societies that is causing unsustainable resource depletion, environmental degradation (and its resulting payback), and financial turmoil.  

Paul
Paul

Bless his heart ... he shore do try real hard ...

Kstein
Kstein

I don't recall you or any other Observer writer making any comment when president Obama said there are 51 states, or pronounced "corps" as "corpse," or when he froze for several seconds, as a candidate, during a 2008 debate, or when he used a TelePrompTer to address a kindergarten class, etc.  Perhaps you did.  But I don't recall it.  If so, my apologies; and if you wouldn't mind posting the links to said comments/posts/articles. 

Olden Dude
Olden Dude

That's all he's good for....Mopping floors. Well said, my man.

engmofo
engmofo

" Cleaning out a pretentious East Dallas urban chicken coop does not."How does a chicken coop become pretentious ,unless it's a scale copy of the Taj Mahal ?

scottindallas
scottindallas

because he's a tool that serves a higher, well compensated agenda.  Higher taxes on the really rich and profitable will grow GDP, and suppress the highest incomes somewhat.  It doesn't drain tax dollars away, but forces the companies and the rich to invest in tangible things, R & D, expand--anything for domestic expenditures or write offs.  Low taxes make hoarding easier, and that's what's happened.  Raise their taxes, it will grow the economy, lower ours, it will grow the economy.  We live paycheck to paycheck, those that manage their money will move it around to avoid taxes.  Low taxes overfills their cup.  I'm talking about the top 10% of the 1%, not you, nor anyone on these boards.

Montemalone
Montemalone

I'm still trying to figure out how he got elected here 3 times.

Rangers100
Rangers100

Are you seriously equating Rick Perry's intellectual abilities with Obama's?

Jeez.

Scruffygeist
Scruffygeist

Your use of a semicolon may very well be incorrect there.

See? Everyone makes errors. The difference between Obama (and, well, anyone) and Perry when it comes to errors boils down to a combination of charisma and not having a stench of arrogance.

lorlee
lorlee

And he's from Illinois so they are the ones who get to be embarrassed about that. The embarrasment factor for Rick Perry falls on us.   I am just tired of all my friends from around the country laughing and pointing and saying "you guys elected that?" 

Jim Schutze
Jim Schutze

Sure. You're right. Excellent point. Rick Perry could have been president of the Harvard Law Review if somebody had just told him what it was.

Albert
Albert

This is a liberal newspaper, they're not going to highlight what you cite, that's not their job.

mantikos
mantikos

'TelePromTer' oh I see what you are doing, StFu?!

Rangers100
Rangers100

I'm not.

It's Texas. We does what we do. Yee haw.

Montemalone
Montemalone

First they'd have to explain what Harvard is.

Albert
Albert

If Perry had offered a heavily-manipulated document as proof of anything, the Observer would have freaked out.

Observist
Observist

You're not seriously talking about Obama's birth certificate, are you?

mantikos
mantikos

Unless she was there noting the brand of the teleprompter being used, she would be correct in using the genericized term instead of the brand name http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/T...Full points for research though!

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