We know how Sports Illustratred's Peter King feels about the situation
-- as opposed to, say, The Situation. Below, a Friend of Unfair Park directs us to a Q&A conducted with ESPN's beloved Sports Guy
, Bill Simmons, in which he provides a Top 10 list of things every city should have before it's allowed to host a Super Bowl. Among the entries:
2. If your city shuts down for drinking at 2 a.m., you probably shouldn't host the Super Bowl.
3. If your downtown isn't big enough to house everybody, so some visitors will have to stay in another city that's at least 35-40 minutes away, you probably shouldn't host the Super Bowl.
10. If the only reason the Super Bowl is in your city is "We just built a new stadium," you shouldn't host the Super Bowl.
The gunman, hardly lone at this point, proceeds to take a few more shots. But then Simmons concludes, if you can't have the game in Las Vegas, Miami, San Diego, New Orleans, etc., well, shit, it might as well be in Dallas.
It's a fun city to visit if you've never been there (the JFK assassination spot pushes it over the top); it's like going to another country (as I've said many times, I believe Texas should secede -- it already has its own flag and identity, now it just needs to start printing its own money); it brings a unique food experience to the table (Texas barbecue); and it offers the best state-of-the-art football stadium on the planet.
ESPN's folks are HQ'd in Fort Worth, though, right?