Dallas Blog

I love a good plate of deep fried sea kittens with a side of hush puppies (preferably cooked in lard).

It's usually best to wait until seakittens grow up to be oceancats, because then they have more meat on them.

The easiest way to kill them is to wring their necks. Clubbing their heads vigorously is also effective, but beware: Sea kittens have unusually hard skulls that can damage softer wood, so be sure not to use your best club unless it is coca-bola or some other ultra-hardwood (or else metal).

Old country secret: To help tenderize the characteristic toughness of sea kitten meat, after you have bled, skinned and beheaded your quarry, leave the entrails in during the roasting process. Voila! Tender, juicy meat. You can then remove the entrails for presentation purposes -- another nice touch is stick an apple in its neckhole -- but it's not necessary. Just slice the roasted flesh against the grain and enjoy!

PETA.....always good for a laugh.

Lacey, I will see what I can do about getting you some Sea Kitten.

You guys are HILARIOUS! Made my day.

@RoB

The kids would be torn to shreds. Sea kittens can get pretty feisty.

Think of the lawsuits.

There's more. Read the PETA "sea kitten stories," which are supposedly intended to be read to children as bedtime stories, e.g.

Bitter and insane [from watching her friends being caught on hooks], Sally the Sea Kitten spends her days plotting revenge against the Land Kittens who live such happy lives in comfortable homes, free from the terror of being eaten.

[drawing shows Sally looking at a recipe for Kitten Souffle, a with cartoon of a cat baked into a souffle]

http://www.peta.org/Sea_Kittens/book.asp

Showing a baked cat to terrify kids into not eating fish? "Bitter and insane" sounds like a good description of the PETA harridans who come up with this stuff.

Not eating meat apparently so exiles one from the world of ordinary human apetites that one comes to believe more people will flock to get a free stuffed animal than to see a naked woman in a cage (not my boy).

Those "sea kitten" bedtime horror stories remind me of a secular version of the Jack Chick religious tracts. It's the same logic: what the ignorant, unconverted masses are doing is so evil, so awful, that it's ok to scare them into believing, using any means necessary. And in the same way that that tactic makes religious fundamentalists look mean-spirited and condescending, PETA gives off the same vibe of "we're allowed to stretch the truth, because we're superior and our cause is righteous -- and you'll thank us, once you're one of us."

i'm not the biggest advocate of PETA, but i don't understand how all these comments revolve around the wonderful beating and abuse of animals. i realize PETA's practices are kind of messed up, but i still don't get people's hate for vegetarians.

I was going to say something similar, RoB. This isn't about promoting a vegetarian lifestyle. And, BTW "confused", fishing is a way of life that goes way back to the dawn of man. It's called survival. Humans need to eat. Fishing is not about beating and abusing animals, it's about catching food, which is something that PETA apparently doesn't understand.