Jesus, Lisa Garza, Just Win This Goddamned Thing Already
No more avoiding the -- yawn -- inevitable: Your Weekly Next Food Network Star update, starring Suze's Lisa Garza. Though what's to say about last night's episode, when Garza was nearly done in by the ridonkulous Jen, who, for whatever reason, thought the best way to open a glass jar was by banging it against a flat-top, awesome. Only, Garza survived because of her evident skills and obvious knowledge -- of the remaining contestants, she's the only one who knows what to do with ... whatchacallit ... food. Kelsey keeps winning elimination challenges, though; and next week's, cooking on Rachael Ray's show in front of a live studio audience, is her "dream," yummo.
Which brings us to next week's episode, when Bobby Flay instructs the remaining five contestants to cook something "innovative and nutritious" they can prep in four minutes on live TV -- oh, and it's for Girl Scouts, awww. Which prompts this quote from Garza: "My 11-year-old son Ian has such a sophisticated palate. I hope Haley does too." Which is why, from the looks of this nine-minute sneak peak, she winds up making a flatiron steak with horseradish cream paired with herbed couscous and broccoli. But not before Garza describes the topping as "a cross between rémoulade and plain horseradish." Kids love that, though she's right, of course: No need to dumb down food for the wee ones. Just hope it doesn't get her a time-out. --Robert Wilonsky