Sports Notes Almost as Long as An 11-Run Sixth Inning

Categories: Sports
You did know FC Dallas was undefeated, no? Well, then, there ya go.

Brought to you by the good folks who sometimes give you Monday Morning Meanderings:

As noted this a.m., The Cowboys finally acquired Adam “Pacman” Jones for a fourth-round draft choice. Bitch and moan all you want about the erosion of America’s Team character, but Terrell Owens and Tank Johnson haven’t stirred up shit here. Great teams can handle wack jobs (see the Bulls and Dennis Rodman; the Patriots and Randy Moss). More importantly, for football purposes Dallas just got a steal -- a cover corner and an elite kick returner. If this latest gamble pays off, don’t think Jerry Jones won’t be salivating over Michael Vick getting out of jail in 15 months ...

Courtesy their allowing the Detroit Tigers an 11-run inning yesterday, Your Texas Rangers secured the worst record in the American League. Not bad, they kept our interest for a whopping 24 days ...

The EDS Byron Nelson Classic is under way with a redesigned course but only one of the world’s Top 10 players (Adam Scott). Because of a particular new rule, however, I predict it will be the most popular weekend in the tournament’s history ...

Call it an educated hunch, but expet to see Jason Terry in the starting lineup in place of Jerry Stackhouse for tomorrow night’s Game 3 against the Hornets. Might even see the quicker Terry guarding Chris Paul. Can’t be any worse than Jason Kidd, right? ...

The Stars expect to get All-Star defenseman Sergei Zubov back on the ice sometime during their series with the San Jose Sharks. Zubov went to Germany recently for secret treatment on his lingering sports hernia. Probably the same magic dust that Dirk Nowitzki sprinkles on his quick-healing injuries ...

Call me cynical, but after listening to Herschel Walker’s book-tour interview rounds, I deduct that one of his multiple personalities (the one that likes to stretch the truth) wrote his exaggerated tome. My dollar is on the one that once claimed he did 2,000 sit-ups and 1,500 push-ups per day. If his other personalities never ever slept or ate or anything but exercise, that’d be 83 sit-ups and 62 push-ups every hour ...

Lost in one of the busiest sports weeks of the year, looks like FC Dallas picked a bad time to stop sniffin’ glue and go undefeated. --Richie Whitt

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