Andrea girlfriend

that is OAKLAWN

when did it turn into UPTOWN?

and this is dallas, do you expect divers to CARE?? or even LOOK?

pjw

PJW -

Could be Oaklawn, but that's a pretty borderline area. I rationalized this to Wilonsky by contending that an Uptown Left is an Uptown Left regardless of where it is committed. I first observed the phenomenon in Uptown, thus the coinage of the term.

Anyway, you make an excellent point re: caring, Dallas, driving.

-Andrea

The lady was probably from Highland Park and was just trying to use her cell phone before she got into the school zone and had to hang up.

Why didn't you just follow her and shoot her? You live in Texas, act like it.

Andrea, you have it all wrong. An UPTOWN LEFT-TURN is when some asshole makes his way around a 26 ton streetcar to jump into the left lane, throw on his turn signal and then sit there and wait for me to smash the shit out of his shiny new Benz, and then try to sue us for hitting him (See, for everyone who has ever wondered, law says that you can't do anything to impede the forward motion of a streetcar. Therefore, if I rear-end you in one, it's still your fault). THAT, my friend, is an Uptown Left Turn.

PS- I volunteer for MATA and I had a charter last Saturday and I made my first down in seven years. Ruined my prefect streetcar driving record. Thanks, drunk asshole who cut me off. It takes a few seconds to stop a big choo-choo train.

andrea dear
sorry i misread the post

and hell yeah it is an "UPTOWN" left

these idiots amaze me

pwj

Oh fun, it was great stereotyping neighborhoods by supposed superior voting patterns. Now let's stereotype neighborhoods by their supposed traffic violations. I like the "East Dallas Right." That's where you're sitting in the right lane on Abrams at Gaston going north and some asshole in the center lane going the same direction in a Ford 350 jumps the light and makes a right turn right in front of your ass and you about plow into his passenger-side door. Yeah, I'd kick his Tollway-Hating ass but for the rifle racked in his back window.

"accommodate your assholery."

brilliant....

consider it stolen.

jack jett

"Assholery"...great word...a new one on me, but it has a lot of potential when applied to Dallas-area drivers.

It's actually called a "'hole shot"...

Short for asshole, I imagine.

That happened to me a few years ago. I wasnt able to stop on time and ended up turning the SUV I hit on its side. You shoulda nailed her. I got paid quite well for my trouble, and got a sweet lortab and flexeril prescription. Nothing says lovin' like flexeril and red wine in the oven.

See, I have yet another definition of an Uptown Left Turn. And while it too can take place in Oak Lawn - because it requires at least one one-way street to occur - it's much more frequent on the east side of Turtle Creek. I THINK this is because side streets are hidden a little better there, what with all the trees blocking the street signs and the moving trucks blocking...well, the streets. (Note: moving trucks required because of the ongoing Uptown Refugee Crisis...the increasingly frantic, somewhat-mass exodus of have-lesses to other areas in order to make way for the have-mores.)

At any rate, my experience with the Uptown Left Turn is when any driver makes a left turn from a one-way street from any lane OTHER than the left lane. For reasons I've never been able to wrap my head around, approximately sixty percent of all drivers do not realize that you can drive in the left lane of a one-way street; indeed, that is why they are designed that way...otherwise, they'd be two-way streets. But I digress. Anyway, said idiot driver(s) then executes a left turn from the center or right lane with little or no warning, usually oblivious to any non-idiot drivers and/or pedestrians traveling or in the vicinity of the left lane. Turn signal is optional (actually, it's a much more effective and memorable tactic to go without).

But that's my two cents. And it's from the perspective of someone who just recently made the jump west of the pond (Turtle Creek) after having spent ten-plus years - dating back to Uptown BC, some might recall - enduring this very phenomenon.

At least I still get to witness those dumb fuckers, though, on my way home from work. Never gets old...

Bruce, thanks for that. I now have a new email sig tag....

"Nothing says lovin' like Flexeril and red wine in the oven"

Andrea, sorry you had to go thru that. When I lived near Richmond and Matilda, I had to endure that shit all the time. I now live in the Cliffs, where people actually do just shoot each other for that.... Consequently, everyone seems to play nicer... Go figure.

I am sure I will be swiftly corrected if I am wrong, but I don't think Cedar Springs and Maple Ave. cross each other. This distracted me so much I could not finish your article. Maybe you were in an alternate universe which would explain why she possibly didn't see you.

mad props on assholery. f'ing brilliant!

BoHan,

Take it easy, are you a Caveman?

Live a little.....love a little.

There is also the Central Expressway Asshole who followed me around the corner onto the northbound service road at Lovers, tailgated me down the ramp, then jumped into the traffic lane across the solid white line as I began to move in. Did these people not learn to take turns in kindergarten? Of course, there are other manifestations of CEA.

Toots - Evs. I refer you to the Schutze Tollway posts, and the commentary thereto, for much worse annoying geopolitical ranting than my traffic jokes. Besides, I think Wilonsky is a caveman, so I'm in good company.

Eric A-

Yes, Cedar Springs and Maple do indeed intersect, right in the shadow of the Crescent.

As always your post or stories are so self centered. It's all about you. Do you ever think about anyone else?

Easy HAL

get your own blog if you are so bothered.

Andrea keep up the fabu work

pjw
a dallas "gay"

This is precisely WHY we have cell phone cameras and blogs. Snap that license plate and post it.

See you tomorrow.

Thanks cp. I have lived in Oaklawn for years and still forget that Cedar Springs makes a whole "stop at a red light" turn. I always refer to that part of Cedar Springs as Turtle Creek Blvd. It is so confusing to those not from here when you give directions and say "...continue on Cedar Springs Rd. and then make a left turn onto Cedar Springs Rd."

They should really fix all that, but first we will have to build a toll road over the top of Turtle Creek, without it we will never get this mess squared away.

Funny. And true. But sorry that happened. See you at the Hold Steady!

A toll road over Turtle Creek, I don't think so, but you could pave over Turtle Creek like Mill Creek was paved over in East Dallas years ago. Then you could have a nice low speed road like the Vote Yes crowd wanted with better access to the park

Somebody brings up that goddamned tollroad in the comments section of damn near every post on this blog. Unfair Park is becoming a fucking drinking game.

"I am sure I will be swiftly corrected if I am wrong, but I don't think Cedar Springs and Maple Ave. cross each other."

LOL sounds like someone that spends all his time in the 972! :)