Grief Counseling

Just ran into a Dallas Morning News staffer who took the paper's buyout, and said writer had this tale to offer before departing for the world of freelance. Before they leave at week's end, staffers are supposed to attend a handful of meetings, where, they believed, they were going to fill out the proper paperwork concerning, oh, their 401k plans and their health insurance benefits. Turns out, not so much.

Instead, employees counting the seconds till they're pushed overboard--pardon, till they jump ship--were greeted by what they could only jokingly refer to a "grief counselor." This morning's get-together was about "closing up and moving on," and during the session, they were asked to answer things like, oh, name five things you're taking away from this experience and what you're going to miss about the place. Shit like that. The person who recounted this tale did so with a wry grin. It wasn't that this person was mad. It's just, well, my friend really would have appreciated it if DMN higher-ups would have been more specific about the meeting in the first place--so folks getting their permanent vacations tickets could have ditched the thing entirely and enjoyed a beautiful day. As it is, my friend left the meeting with a hearty "thanks but no thanks." I think this is what they call wishing you luck with a capital F. --Robert Wilonsky