Verizon Spani-pages

Say what you want about criminalizing or legalizing Hispanic immigrants--the changes, it seems, are really coming from everywhere but Washington. Even if you're an illegal resident, if you want to finance a house, get medical care or a tax refund, you certainly can.

But what if your 14-year-old daughter just can't find the right dress for her Quincea�era? What if--God forbid--the computer's down and you lost the number for the Pizza Patr�n? Well, if Verizon's demographic analysts say you live in a Hispanic neighborhood, then you'll be able to scoop up the first major Spanish-language yellow pages, delivered right to your door this week.

Dallas is the first market to receive the Spanish directory (with included Quincea�era guide), delivered with an accompanying English yellow pages, and it's something I plan to take full advantage of. I'm pretty sure my digs in Deep Ellum won't register as an Hispanic neighborhood (maybe an edition with a Dallas butt-rock guide is on the way?), but you folks in South Dallas and Oak Cliff better look out for a rogue reporter scooping books off your front porch in the pre-dawn hours.

Those are just a couple of the neighborhoods Verizon reps tell me they've identified as "target communities" for the Spanish edition. I'll be damned if the best way for this little white girl to learn Spanish isn't to start with memorizing useful yellow page words and phrases such as renta de autos, bibliotecas, iglesias and, "Hey, my sink's all stopped up, I need el plomero!" --Andrea Grimes