Cowboy Joseph Randle Gets an Underwear Endorsement Deal for Stealing Underwear

Categories: Sports

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Dallas Cowboys
Steal some underwear, get some free underwear. Circle of life.
In a move that's a bit like Fiskars hiring Michael Irvin as a spokesman , MeUndies, a Los Angeles-based underwear company, is bringing on Cowboys backup running back Joseph Randle to sell $20 pairs of boxer briefs.

Randle, who is making $495,000 this season, was arrested last Monday for absconding with $39.50 worth of Polo underwear and an $84 tester bottle of Gucci Guilty Black cologne from a Frisco Dillard's. Randle told police he took the items because he didn't want to take the time to pay, which is somehow both the dumbest and most sensible explanation for stealing something.

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We Did Good on Ebola. It's the Spin that Got Us.

Categories: Schutze

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Wdstckdr via hitchikers.wikia.com

Hoping it's not bad luck to say this so soon, knocking on wood, rubbing my figurative rabbit's foot (my wife won't let me carry a real one), but I think this city and maybe even the nation deserve praise for overwhelming equanimity in the face of the first American Ebola cases. What the response so far shows is that we handle the truth a lot better than we do lies, and we tend to have real respect for real doctors as opposed to spin doctors.

Sure, there has been some flat-out goofiness, as in the school district in Maine that sent a teacher into quarantine because she had attended a conference in Dallas. But people in Maine are famously xenophobic anyway. Just like Texans.


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The Cowboys' Tight Ends Are Quietly Killing It

Categories: Sports

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Nicole Cordeiro
The Cowboys looked really good again. I'm questioning a lot of things.
As the Cowboys have marched to their best seven game start since 2007, the accolades have been plentiful and plentifully spread around. DeMarco Murray has, deservedly, been lauded as the second coming of Tony Dorsett with each successive 100-yard performance. The defense is "improved" and "flying to the ball." Tony Romo is avoiding mistakes and converting third downs at a remarkable clip. The offensive line is the best in the league. You could hear all these things just watching the highlight shows between the end of Cowboys-Giants and the start of Broncos-49ers Sunday night.

One unit that hasn't received the plaudits, but is essential to what the Cowboys are doing on offense this year, is the team's tight ends. Jason Witten, Gavin Escobar and James Hanna were outstanding again Sunday and will continue to key the team as it moves toward the second half of the season.

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Mark Cuban: Good at Owning Basketball Teams, Terrible at Real Estate

Categories: Real Estate

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Dallas -- nay, America -- has many good reasons to love Mark Cuban. He turned the Mavericks into NBA champions. He's the most accessible billionaire in the universe. He yells at terrible refs on our behalf and feuds with the Perots. He was a disruptor before disrupting was cool. But for all of Cuban's endearing qualities, let's be honest about something: He's really terrible at real estate.

The sample size here is small, just the office complex he wants to build at Preston Road and Northwest Highway and Wonderview, the gigantic mixed-use development he was going to build on a landfill next to Cedar Crest Golf Course.

Wonderview was announced in 2010 to great fanfare and rosy predictions that it would save southern Dallas. It would be massive, 176 acres of shops, apartments, townhouses, sports fields, parks, the Mavs' headquarters and so on costing up to $1 billion Construction was imminent.

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Maine Now Quarantining People for Setting Foot in Dallas

Categories: Healthcare

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Google Maps
This is not close.
If you want any real Ebola news, check out the Friday afternoon update. If you want to see something we barely believe isn't from The Onion, keep reading.

In a move that makes Highland Park ISD's response to Ebola seem thoughtful and measured, Maine School Administrative District 58 has placed a teacher on paid administrative leave due to parental fears of her being exposed to Ebola. The teacher's crime? Attending a seminar held by the Smarter Balanced Assessment Consortium in Dallas.

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Your Friday Afternoon Ebola Digest

Categories: Healthcare

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Centers for Disease Control
Transmission electron micrograph of the Ebola virus
Heading into a much needed weekend, here's the latest Ebola news of note:

The condition of the patients.
Nina Pham is now being treated at a National Institutes of Health facility in Maryland. She is listed as being in fair condition. While she was listed in good condition at Presbyterian, doctors at NIH have stressed that her condition has not "deteriorated." Video released of Pham just before her transfer shows her in good spirits. Amber Vinson, the second Presbyterian nurse to contract Ebola, is in stable condition at Emory University Hospital in Atlanta.

Baylor sends potential Ebola patient to Presbyterian.
Late Thursday, an individual came into the Baylor emergency room through a private entrance reporting Ebola symptoms and contact with someone with Ebola. The hospital has issued a statement on its Facebook page that reads a lot like the statement the city of Frisco issued after Michael Monnig showed up at the Care Now.

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Miles/Nutall Thing Is About Turf and Who Runs DISD, Her or Him.

Categories: Schutze

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Wikipedia
Turf. Its dirty. But people fight for it.

Talk about mixed feelings this morning. On the one hand thanks to a youthful experience I would rather not recount here in colorful detail, I know exactly how Dallas school board member Bernadette Nutall feels about getting rousted by the cops earlier this week in a Dallas school building. My heart goes out.

See also: Mike Miles and Bernadette Nuttall Slap Leather

On the other hand, the same experience leads me to believe she's entirely in the wrong for thinking somebody owes her an apology. If anything, she owes an apology to school Superintendent Mike Miles, who had to sic the gendarmes on her, but even more than that she owes a big mea culpa to the board on which she sits, for violating their basic charter and, frankly, making them all look a bit like fools.

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Local Attorneys Gearing Up For Ebola Lawsuits

Categories: Legal Battles

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Emily Mathis
Local attorneys are preparing for legal action for hospital employees and Thomas Eric Duncan's family members.

The rhetoric from Texas Health Presbyterian Hospital nurses in the last several days has been vehement. Nurses are anonymously alleging that the hospital did not take proper steps to prevent contamination and infection, which ultimately led to nurses Amber Vinson and Nina Pham contracting Ebola from patient Thomas Eric Duncan. "In the end, the nurses strongly feel unsupported, unprepared, deserted and lied to in preparing for this," said National Nurses United spokesperson Deborah Burger in a press conference on Wednesday.

See also: Presbyterian's Nurses Are Pushing Back on the CDC and Hospital Over Handling of Ebola

And Texas Health Resources is scrambling to counteract the claims. "National Nurses United recently made allegations regarding the protocols and equipment in place during Thomas Eric Duncan's treatment at Texas Health Presbyterian Hospital Dallas. The assertions do not reflect actual facts learned from the medical record and interactions with clinical caregivers," said spokesperson Candace White in an e-mail statement. "Our hospital followed the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) guidelines and sought additional guidance and clarity."

Still, chances are good that when the outbreak has subsided, Presbyterian's owner, Texas Health Resources, along with the CDC and any other group involved in treating the virus will be facing several lawsuits. Charla Aldous, a lead attorney with Aldous Law Firm in Dallas, said she could not give any details, but confirmed that someone involved in the Ebola outbreak has reached out to her about a possible suit. "I have been contacted, but cannot disclose the names," she says. "I have not yet been formally retained."

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Texas Construction Workers Say Aldi, Dallas Subcontractor Ripped Them Off for $20,000

Categories: Development

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Mike Mozart

UPDATE: On Friday, the general contractor sent over a check covering the lien. "While this still does not cover the entirety of the missing wages, the payment is a victory for workers," Workers Defense Project says in a statement.

"By ensuring that workers are paid for their work, Aldi Supermarket is demonstrating a commitment to a responsible business model and is acting as a model for all businesses to follow," the group adds.

On the phone today, the subcontractor accused of dropping the ball confirmed that he had received invoices for around $20,000 from the workers. But he claims that the workers had agreed beforehand to do additional work on the Aldi store for free.

"All their invoices were falsified," says Dion Islas, the owner of Advanced Electric. Islas says the workers had signed papers agreeing only to be paid for a certain time period, and then "the only times they were on the job after that point were to repair their own mistakes," he says.
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Aldi was recently crowned "the best grocery store in America" by Slate, the popular yuppy think-piece website, making the discount grocery chain socially acceptable for $30,000 millionaires everywhere. The store's cheap quirks include requiring a 25-cent deposit for a shopping cart, which they say helps them save money on store employees and pass the savings down to customers.

But in a state notorious for ripping off its construction workers, perhaps Aldi is taking the "not having to hire someone in the name of savings" idea too far.

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Oklahoma Teen Killed Family Before Spending UT/OU Weekend in Dallas, Prosecutors Say

Categories: Crime

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Stephens County
Alan Hruby
Alan Hruby is a 19-year-old shopaholic.

"There is no bigger rush then [sic] getting to the register at a store and swiping your credit card. And in that moment you are waiting for the screen to say, 'Approved' you start to get heart palpitations and you get a rush of adrenaline. By the time she is handing your stuff to you, you are so high on adrenaline, the $15,000 total does not even phase [sic] you until you've gotten home and seen the receipts," Hruby said in a now-deleted February blog post.

Hruby brags about his shoe collection, about the points he earns on his numerous credit cards. He doesn't mention the criminal charge for opening a credit card in his grandmother's name and spending $5,000 on a six-week trip to Europe provided by his parents, nor his assault of his mother two years ago after a fight about money.

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