​10.Two of the sweetest words to any man's ears: Free. Upgrade. Thank you, US Airways.

9. For the life of me I can't figure out why casinos offer the game of War. It's the the most balanced, fair game in Vegas. It's high-card wins, with ties merely forcing the player to double the bet for another hand. Higher stakes, but no change to the odds. There's no green spaces like Roulette. No juice on winning hands like Baccarat. No hidden hole cards like Blackjack. It's basically a coin flip. Zero strategy, 100-percent luck and the fastest, easiest way to win money in Sin City. If you can find a War table, play it. You'll like it.

8. The day before heading out I went to a pool party and somehow dropped a $50 bottle of Patron tequila on my buddy's garage floor. How strong is it? Literally ate away the protective coating seal off his garage floor. Imagine what it does to our stomach.

7. As for futures sports bets at MGM, the Rangers to win the World Series stood at 14-1, the Cowboys to win Super Bowl XLVI at 18-1 and the Mavs to win the 2012 NBA Finals at 8-1.

6. Nothing like walking out of a strip club with a girlfriend, two new friends and being greeted by ... sunrise.

More »

​10. Ate dinner last night at Prime Italian on South Beach. In the midst of ridiculous opulence in the form of $20 valet parking and $100,000 cars, it was relatively affordable. $125 for a steak and a couple drinks. Thumbs up.

9. They also offered prime Kobe steak for $30 an ounce. Our waiter said Bulls' forward Carlos Boozer recently ate a 20-ounce version. By my sportswriter math that's a $600 piece of meat. Impressive.

8. South Beach, by the way, is a 23-block area on the strip of beach that seperates the Atlantic Ocean from Miami's Biscayne Bay. The locals call it "SoBe." Oh so chic.

7. Although it's a public beach, it's also topless-friendly. Especially down by the Clevelander hotel made famous for its MTV spring break parties.

6. Collins Avenue. Ocean Avenue. And two blocks south or west ... ghetto. It's like Highland Park and Kiest Park being seperated by a sidewalk. There's a restaurant called Big Pink that was packed with people on the patio. Might as well been called the Sitting Duck. Just last week, for example, a shooting on Collins.

More »

​Osama Bin Laden is dead.

But the fight -- and the hefty price -- to fend off terrorists around the globe lives on.

Just yesterday, for example, eight more American soldiers were confirmed dead in Operation Enduring Freedom in Afghanistan. Sad, but let's face it, we've become numb to the numbers. As civilians we don't have a grasp on the motivation or goal of the so-called wars and have become oblivious to military deaths in America's effort to "win."

Since the start of the Revolutionary War in 1775, more than 2.5 million Americans have been killed in combat.

More »

Not exactly a sellout at Sheen's supposed 8 p.m. kickoff

10. I'm not real good sucky at math, but I'm estimating there were 1,500 people at American Airlines Center last night for Charlie Sheen's "Violent Torpedo of Truth" Tour. The AAC holds 20,000, and no way it was 10 percent full. Sad.

9. Sheen entered late -- at exactly 8:33 -- and through the crowd, high-fiving fans and wearing a basic blue Mavericks warm-up jacket. Surprisingly, Mark Cuban was never mentioned, much less present.

8. I've known and respected 106.1 KISS FM's Kidd Kraddick for years, but his part in the process was shockingly gawdawful. During a sit-down Q&A on the stage, Kraddick simply read random questions from fans off his Facebook and Twitter. Too bad, because Kidd can be an engaging interviewer. But the segment gave us zero insight into Sheen or what the hell he was trying to do via the tour. And on a question about his 9/11 conspiracy thoughts, Kraddick allowed Sheen to basically "no comment." That wasn't violent or truth or anything remotely torpedo-esque. It was just plain weak.

7. After reading a Houston Chronicle review from his previous tour stop, Sheen explained his thick skin thusly: "If you don't have fucking feelings you never get your feelings hurt."

6. Down to one "goddess" in the wake of being dumped by Bree Olson, Sheen had overrated gilfriend Natalie Kenly toss out T-shirts to the crowd.

More »

Beware.

​I got a theory.

Been working on it for a while, nurturing it from a fleeting thought to a flimsy premise all the way up to a working, rational theory.

Here it is: There are no more aggressive, dangerous drivers on Metroplex highways than those in white pickups. I know, 18-wheelers and motorcycles. Yadda, yadda and more yadda.

I leave my house in McKinney roundabout 5:30 a.m. Every day, almost without fail, as I'm driving south on 75 I am passed by a slew of pickup trucks, at least a handful of them white. Distinction? The white ones, for whatever reason, are more likely to flash their lights in an attempt to get me to move over and more likely to speedweave in and out of traffic. I remind you, this all before 6 a.m.

This morning, sure enough, a white pickup passed me in Plano just a couple minutes before in Richardson traffic was briefly backed up because of a wreck involving - you guessed it - a white pickup.

Finally, as I exited - that's exited - 75 for CBS Radio headquarters two bright headlights flew up behind me. I'm going like 70, gradually decelerating to around 40 because I wholly intend to merge issue-free onto the access road and then fully stop at the red light. But the - one more time - white truck had other ideas. So it whips around me and briefly back into the right lane of the highway before cutting in front of me on the ramp and speeding to the light, where a couple seconds later I pulled up beside it to hear - I shit you not - the distinctive baritone of Kenny Chesney.

Allow me to expound ...

More »

​Third date time hanging out together. High hopes.

True story.

So we go to dinner and a couple drinks. Bueno. Go back to her place not far from my house in McKinney. Perfect.

She takes the initiative. Sets the mood. Color me desperate horny intrigued.

Not big on baths, but what the hey. She's hot. Warm-ish water. Bubbles. Candles on the tub. Music in the background.

Game on.

Shit does indeed happen ...

More »

​The Cowboys won't be in Miami for Super Bowl XLIV February 7, but Dallas will be represented all over South Beach in the form of the latest and greatest in safe, sassy transportation - VAULT.

I saw this thing - it's like a giant combo limousine/Hummer/armored truck - pull up to a Dallas night spot recently and out climbed none other than Shaquille O'Neal. Then a couple weeks ago at a North Texas Super Bowl XLV event Tim Brown arrived in a VAULT. (I know what you're thinking, Tupac coulda used one of these back in '96. And you're right.)

Dallas-based VAULT Services plans to have 25 of their cutting-edge vehicles in Miami and I get the feeling these babies will be a hot product next month when the NBA All-Star Game and its accompanying posses hit town.

"Never before has a company dedicated a fleet of vehicles like this to major sporting events," says Vice President of Media Relations for VAULT Services LP Wally Lynn, a familiar Metroplex radio voice for two decades. "The VAULT fills a unique niche for our clients at high profile events in the post 9/11 world."

More »

​Last night I'm in my car, sitting at a light in McKinney. I'm third back in the right lane. Minding my own business, pondering Cowboys-Vikings, wondering where is the best place to buy bulk 5-hour Energy drinks, convincing myself that the "thud" back up the road was a box and not a dog when, all the sudden, a car from the left honks at me.

He gestures for me to scoot back. Seeing that there is a car behind me, I gesture back that I don't necessarily think his idea is all that grand. The car in front of me inches up, allowing the guy from the far left lane to to cross into the right lane and ...

More »

​Okay, so I did a little experiment. I was waiting for my computer to start up yesterday morning and I thought "Damn, I hate waiting."

You're familiar with that feeling I assume.

I'm not necessarily an impatient person. Traffic doesn't ruin my day. I'll let folks with just a few items cut in front of me at the grocery store. But with two full-time jobs these days time has become a more precious commodity and I realized my patience - like my hair -  is thinning.

I put a stopwatch (thanks iPhone!) to the madness on Monday. Every time I waited - for an Internet site to load, stopped in traffic, on hold on the phone, whatever - I started the clock.

I was amazed at how much time I spent doing absolutely nothing. Any guesses?

More »

Ready for a happy weird year? Well, c'mon!

​My New Year's resolution? To be more positive. More optimistic. More don't-look-now-but-holy-hell-my-glass-is-half-full.

Bear with me, this is gonna be tougher than going without a crumb of food for 10 days.

Ready? Here goes. I'm open to the idea of Wade Phillips returning as Dallas Cowboys' head coach, assuming they beat the Philadelphia Eagles Saturday night in Arlington. I loved The Blind Side and am willing to see Youth in Revolt despite the presence of wet-bread whiny-ass Michael Cera. And I'll watch TCU in the Fiesta Bowl tonight even though it doesn't matter even a little bitty bit in college football's grandiose photo.

How amiable am I these days? For New Year's I conformed to a costume party, dressing up as a Jeffery Sebelia character from a BravoTV show I'd never seen. So there.

However ...

More »