Whitt's End: 5.6.11

Categories: Whitt's End
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Whether you've reached the end of your rope or merely the end of your week, welcome to Whitt's End:

*Mavericks-Lakers and Rangers-Yankees in our town in the same weekend. Delicious. If you had a front-row ticket to just one, which would it be? Are there really semi-sane humans who'd choose baseball regular-season game 33 over basketball playoff game 3? Scary.

*You know that I've been trumpeting Dirk Nowitzki for years. Way before I arrived at the Dallas Observer and then since the day I got here. I guess I should be happy that all these national voices have hopped aboard the bandwagon that I've steered seemingly solo for a decade. So why am I cringing when I hear guys like Charles Barkley and Jalen Rose just nonchalantly praising him as an "elite superstar," an "impossible cover" and "the most skilled 7-footer in the history of our game"? Because it feels like I've been in the kitchen making cookies for years and folks have passed by snickering about how they weren't hungry and about how I couldn't cook a lick. Now, suddenly those same people are lined up around the block for a sample, upon which they exclaim, "Yep, I always knew these would be damn good cookies."

*If the Mavs beat the Lakers and play in the Western Conference Finals, we could be in for a very cool convergence. Of playoff intensity basketball and ... the end of the world. Yep, the latest round of "Jesus is Coming!" doomsdayers are targeting May 21 for The Rapture. That's a Saturday, so if the Mavs are hosting the Grizzlies or Thunder it could be a very sparse crowd at American Airlines Center. Then again, this Harold Camping guy originally predicted 1994 as the end of the end, then re-did the math and came up with two weeks from tomorrow, so we might not need to pack after all. Besides, surely Jesus will watch the game from an AAC luxury suite before ascending back to Heaven, right?

*Apparently 105.3 The Fan's RJ Choppy, Arnie Spanier, Josh Lewin and Greggo all picked the Mavs to beat the Lakers. I'm impressed. Me and all these dorks had it all wrong. I think.

*Something named Uncle Mo was supposed to win tomorrow's big horse race and then pulled a hoof or ate some bad oats or some such. Don't really care. The Kentucky Derby is the most overrated event in sports. I just don't get the fascination with horsepower, either in cars or animals. Give me humanpower any day.

*Shame on President Obama for not releasing Osama's death photos. Fuels another conspiracy after he'd just put the birther thing to bed. And the premise that the pics are just too gruesome is asinine. We've handled footage of JFK's head exploding all these years and we're repeatedly shown the deaths of thousands of Americans via the Twin Towers collapsing.

*I know you guys are too red meat-'n-full contact to consider tennis a sport, but there's an interesting start to the 2011 season. A player is off to the best record since Ivan Lendl in 1986, and his name isn't Rafael Nadal or Roger Federer. Novak Djokovic is 29-0. He will not, however, beat Nadal on the French Open clay.

*Hot.

*Not.

*Don't dismiss the loss of Ron Artest in tonight's Game 3 as merely L.A. being down a knucklehead. Artest is still a good defender and one of Phil Jackson's options to cover Dirk. Plus, he'd started all 90 of L.A.'s games. Until tonight. Advantage: Dallas. For the series it's Barea 20, Artest 13.

*Talked to former Maverick Mark Aguirre Thursday and asked him about the Lakers' lethargy against the Mavs in Game 2. "I don't see the burning desire in their eyes or their play anymore," he said. Interesting.

*Death. Taxes. Nelson Cruz leg injuries. Whether it's hamstrings or quads, the Rangers outfielder will always be injury prone. Knock on a Louisville Slugger, so far it's nothing too serious.

*With Tony Romo's wedding taking place at basically a public venue in Turtle Creek, will it be Dallas' closest thing to a Royal Wedding?

*Sorry, soccer fans. FC Dallas' reigning MLS MVP David Ferreira is out indefinitely after undergoing surgery to repair a broken ankle suffered April 23. Quick poll, how many of you knew Ferreira was the MLS MVP? And how many even knew the MLS season had started?


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75 comments
Corsrr
Corsrr

Anyone home? MAVS!

Jb33
Jb33

Richie don't go away mad just get the hell out of the print media and off our airways, all the other DHs are gone just one left and that's YOU, my spy tells me it won't be long.....

ThongNCheese
ThongNCheese

The Sea of Blue was in full force tonight!

Davy Crockett
Davy Crockett

" Little people can be gigantic assholes." Finally on the bandwagon all of us have been steering?

Scruffygeist
Scruffygeist

The RAGE defense force is about as strong as Michael Young's fielding ability.

LAZER SUX
LAZER SUX

yeah, i know christ is seemingly everybody's penata these days.. but it ain't cool. not even remotely. whatever you got to say, say it! and if you gotta take the low road, then just know that you're cruising...

P1 Ben
P1 Ben

your loss, Whitt. I figured an ogler such as yourself would be at least interested in tanned women clad in sundresses, big hats, and little else for an afternoon. That's what will be @ the track tomorrow. Plus, the ponies are pretty good athletes themselves. p.s. Uncle Mo has an intestinal ailment, hence the scratch

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin

I cant stand UFC, morespecifically watching it at a bar. I dont really enjoy hanging with a bunch of meatheads who get drunk and then think they can fight too. The Rangers were 16-14 last year too, not too worried yet but I am enjoying evan grant and his twitter escapades with hashtags, #bullpenisamess, unintended humor If it takes Martin Leonys to compete with Borbon to make borbon play like he has this week then good. The Rangers will be better for it. So if borbon catches fire, and martin is ready to come u, maybe we can trade borbon for some bullpen help. How many laker jerseys with NY hats will we see around town this weekend

I know the MLS MVP but Ive followed the Dallas Burn/FC Dallas since they've been here.

Ill bet you a beer Richie, that if djokovic plays nadal on the clay this year he beats Nadal.

Eff Artest

Give me some derby, I dont mind betting 5 or 6 different 3 horse tri-boxes for tha tshot at hitting a monster trifecta payout. But you are right, you can have all the pomp and circumstance though, just give me 20 horse fields

SFBL, Getting to the top was easy, a decent draft, but staying is a son of a bitch. The waiver wire and Free agency are my best friend right now. Im not too interested in trading any of my top guys wich is why have not accepted anyones trade offers. Sad news about Merten leaving the big O. Has TKR even changed his lineup.

cactusflinthead
cactusflinthead

Kentucky: pass the bourbon, keep the horses and hats.

Soccer: meh. I nap through enough slow baseball games as it is.

Tennis: snore.

Playoffs over regular season: pick any 2 of the big 4 and it applies.

I wasn't exactly thrilled about my own wedding why in the hell should I give a damn about Romo's or the Prince's for that matter? There are only 2 reasons why men go to those things anyway, booze and the women that made us be there.

I just like hearing Barkley give the Mavs and Dirk props. About time.

Watching the Rangers in recent weeks has been hard on my blood pressure. Doctor told me to cut back.

Midgets, assholery and RW: that is called low hanging fruit.

pot meet kettle
pot meet kettle

"Bottom line: Little people can be gigantic assholes."

yep, you certainly would know.

Scruffygeist
Scruffygeist

Pretty solid effort from you this week. You've gone from Dave Bush to Dutch Oven. You're not CJ yet.

Front row at playoff hoops anytime. Not even difficult to decide.

Everyone in Dallas (except a certain segment you always hear calling in to stations claiming he's too white and soft) knows Dirk has been elite for over 10 years. But since he doesn't do commercials or mouth off or seek the spotlight, he's apparently under the nation's radar. Best Euro ever, by far. Top 50 player of all time as far as I'm concerned. He brought elements never seen before in a dude his size.

Gagreed on horse racing. The Kentucky Derby prerace circlejerk is the biggest waste of time since the Masters and CBS act like that tourney is the peak of sophistication.

Glad to see Borbon will either have a fire lit under him or be replaced. This team needs a centerfielder who can lead off--I'm already tired of what it does to Kinsler in that slot. Captain Uppercut is working my Rangers nerves.

Nobody outside of a low-rated FM sports station cares about Romo's wedding.

See? You can recognize assholery. Turn that recognition inward...

A good week doesn't mean you can slack off next week. Don't tease us with good content again and then spit the bit, we'll nutkick in a second.

Timbo
Timbo

For SHAME? Really? Shame? Do you really think conspiracy theorists will be satisfied by a death photo? They'll simply say it's the work of CIA photo shop agents, especially if he's wearing a Ticket t-shirt.

Another A-hole with an Opinion
Another A-hole with an Opinion

I do beleive Al-Qaida has confirmed the death of bin Laden and so has his 12 year old daughter who happened to be in the house.

reality check
reality check

I think soccer, boxing and horse racing will do just fine without RW's stamp of approval.

The MLS is triple A soccer at best. Next time, go kick the Round Rock Express's nuts for fan disinterest instead.

Check out the 5/28 soccer superbowl Barcelona versus Manchester U to see the masters of the sport perform their magic.

Rude/crass/abhorrent: UFC, if that photo is indicative.

Borbon is hitting .379 in his last 11 games. Murphy .214 during that stretch. Cruz .179.

Martin shows promise as a centerfielder. His .314 BA and 1-to-1 BB/K ratio during his Cuban League career will hopefully translate into a decent OBP in the majors.

TheRealDirtyP1
TheRealDirtyP1

Good Ender RW.-Hey who knows? The Mavs could lose this thing and then you wouldn't be 100% wrong at least, toldya.-Thanks for the link on the HOT that has a page with a lot of NSFW photos. Can you grab a pic from a site that doesn't have nudity? Appreciate ya pal.-Dirk is AWESOME. Best 7 footer ever? Nah. He plays Power Forward, and isn't in the same sentence as Duncan, Malone, or Barkley. He's really just a guy that has no position, so I don't really know where you'd put him all-time. Offensively he could take any of those guys, but on the flip side so could they. -Horse racing is so white and so overrated. -MLS, meh. -Being a member of the sub-6 foot crowd that we both belong in, I think I handle life pretty well. I do feel for you and your midget friends though, and understand your anger. I'm sure some doctor will make leg lengthening popular someday, but unless your radio bit gets better don't count on your normal discount.

Later M-Effers!

jamal
jamal

Don't cringe. If it takes Barkley in Dirk's corner to get all these clueless pieces of shit to come around on Dirk, then so be it. Him finally getting the recognition he deserves is good for the the Mavs in all kinds of ways.

The Kentucky Derby is NBA All Star Weekend- for white people.

I wonder how many people will read that (and my name) and think I'm black.

linefourguy
linefourguy

Don't be so hard on yourself Richie. You're not a gigantic asshole, you're a gigantic douche asshole. Claiming to be the only one in media to see Dirk's talent early on is bullshit. That's the type of claim only a douche midget with Napoleon Syndrome makes.

gofuhcureself
gofuhcureself

hahaha....I have to give you credit.....that's pretty funny right there.

Billy Batts
Billy Batts

lazer has more fans than ur sorry excuse for a sports station does listeners.

NOW GO HOME AND GET YOUR FUCKING SHINEBOX

Storm_71
Storm_71

Yeah I like to smoke pot too sometimes.

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin

Weddings, the only thing men like about our wedding day besides beer is the fact that it probably the last night you are guaranteed to get laid by your wife. She controls that function the rest of you life

LAZER SUX
LAZER SUX

yeah, don't you have some bar or some pussy to get to? did'nt think so...

Josh's broken records
Josh's broken records

You sir, are the voice of the commentariat. And if RW is reading, you've done better since about Wednesday...don't drop the ball, because we are waiting with the pointiest of manly footwear.

LAZER SUX
LAZER SUX

yeah, c'mere.. c'mere, listen. i gotta little secret for ya: NOBODY GIVES A FUCK ABOUT THE TICKET, FUCKFACE!! awww, it's o.k. don't cry, i did'nt mean to yell. WHAT KIND OF A NO-LIFE HAVIN' FUCK DO YOU HAVE TO BE TO LISTEN TO REGURGITATION LIKE THAT TRIPE!!! now you run along and have a nice life, o.k.?

LAZER SUX
LAZER SUX

kinda let the cat outta the fucking bag, did'nt ya, you fucking narcissistic piece of shit! quit race-baiting, and go do the only baiting you are TRULY familiar with, chump..

De'Quan Amani Washington
De'Quan Amani Washington

if u aint black then ur mom was doing a bit when she named you.

u can get her back by NOT getting her a mother's day gift.

btw, im not black either

Storm_71
Storm_71

"I wonder how many people will read that (and my name) and think I'm black."

Why would anyone even care?

gofuhcureself
gofuhcureself

I think it's worth mentioning again the definition of Napoleon Syndrome from the Urban Dictionary:

"A backwoods term for a short white man who acts black, i.e. "Wigger". Napoleon complex (also Napoleon syndrome) describes a type of inferiority complex suffered by caucasian men who are short and/or suffer from erectile dysfunction. Characteristics include lying to inflate importance i.e. "I have a red corvette. It's in the shop right now.", sporting the "bling", recording rap songs, and using a "street name" on the internet i.e. aredubya1"

Ex..."Shit mang, that wigga is 4ft tall and said he bangs ho's like Brianna Banks. He gots da napoleon complex."

Josh's broken records
Josh's broken records

Like they say " she's got half the money and all the p..If Momma aint happy then no one is..." I'm here all day (til 2:30ish anyhow, seems pretty nice outside)

LAZER SUX
LAZER SUX

"manly footwear"??? you hang out at buddies, don't you??

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin

so how do you know about Lazer, oh thats right, you heard it listneing to Norm or BADD otherwise you wouldnt know who the fuc they are. If we took a vote hereI m sure eveyron would agree that your postings are shit. Are you one of those roided midget wrasslers or something

ur mom
ur mom

why aren't you in school, fucktard?

Storm_71
Storm_71

Newy Scruggs volatile diarrhea???

Greggo's coke mirror
Greggo's coke mirror

Armin? Is that you? I guess you are butthurt from getting your ass kicked by midgets.

Scruffygeist
Scruffygeist

Using Urban Dictionary as a credible source is like citing Wikipedia.

Josh's broken records
Josh's broken records

That's not the proper def, GFU, proper def is: Short dude that walks/talks like a badass..i.e. Napoleon Bonnaparte

gofuhcureself
gofuhcureself

never said it was credible. just thought it was funny. BTW, HBS I am fully aware of the whole Napoleon Bonaparte thing - was just trying for a laugh. I have no room to talk, though. I'm a pretty short mofo myself. :-)

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