If and When the NFL Returns, Its Returns Will Be Boring

Categories: Dallas Cowboys

Football Jesus.jpg
Safety? Jesus doesn't even need a helmet.

I grew up watching an NFL with kick-offs from the 40-yard line and goal posts positioned in the end zone, so I cherish my modern-day returns.

And I know the league has a new focus on health and safety, but I don't like the proposed rule changes being kicked about at the NFL owners' meetings in New Orleans this week. Owners are expected to vote today on a rule that would move kickoffs from the 30 to the 35, prevent kicking-team players to line up more than five yards behind the kicker, eliminate altogether the blocking wedge and bring touchbacks out to the 25 instead of the 20.

UPDATE: Kickoffs at the 35, but touchbacks still to the 20.

It's drastic. It's game-changing.

It needs 75 percent approval to pass, and there'll be staunch opposition from teams like the Chicago Bears who have invested millions in returners such as Devin Hester. And if I'm Dallas Cowboys' kicker David Buehler, I'm hoping this thing sails wide left.

Watching a player take a knee in the end zone isn't exciting. Nor is watching kickers - with the shorter distance big-leg kickers like Buehler won't be such a premium - boom the ball out of the back of the end zone.

I guess it's safety vs. entertainment, and I guess I'm supposed to feel guilty on where I stand.

I don't like injuries, but I'm drawn to the violence of the NFL. I wouldn't be interested in buying a DVD not of the biggest hits, but rather of the longest kickoffs. We don't watch Jackass because it reigns the danger in, but rather pushes it past the logical ledge. And ABC's Wipeout is on TV not because contestants make it through the goofy gauntlets unscathed, but rather because they, well, wipeout.

Owners today also will vote on strengthening and expanding the "defenseless player" rule to include a receiver who has made a completed catch but hasn't had time to protect himself.

I don't know about you, but I don't like where this is all headed.

In a sorta related story, I'm very confused by Jerry Jones' lockout sunglasses.

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Fail Fans,all five of them
Fail Fans,all five of them

If and When the NFL Returns, Its Returns Will Be Boring

Much like your return from vacation after Sam filled in.

Whew!
Whew!

yeah, fuck sports. let's go buy scented candles instead...

kergo
kergo

This is because the NFL will never be like a nice spring day, strolling up to Lake Texoma and unwinding. I like to get the veggies going. Some bell peppers, onions, even throw some mushrooms in there. Put together a nice sauce and have good meal while listening to a baseball game on the radio. The NFL just can't do that for you.

Scruffygeist
Scruffygeist

If they do this they have to eliminate the beatdown of extra point/commercial break/kickoff/commercial break/start of drive...but they won't. But there's sure no reason for force us to watch the same damn truck commercial for the 40th time bookending a kickoff that's now no more exciting than a technical free throw. Except for ad revenue, since the owners are just barely scraping by...

Mishon
Mishon

This is just getting ridiculous. What is going on with the NFL? They are doing their best to try and ruin the best thing we have in sports.

TheRealDirtyP1
TheRealDirtyP1

solid post RW. Another non-? post. Bravo buddy, keep it up! I like your strong sports opinions. Stop catering to Kergo and Rooster.Your link goes to the Espn Dallas main page. No Jerry sunglasses.... I can't make myself Ben and Skin.

kergo
kergo

I'm the one who does the catering around here.

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin

Whats the point of kickoffs then. After a touchdown, place the ball at the 25 and move on. They could save us 7 commercial breaks a game, and cut about 20 minutes off the length of a football game. Also, get rid of the extra point too. If a team scores a touchdown, they automatically get the extra point, unless they want to go for 2, then they attempt the PAT.Oh and eff the NFL owners and players

McDoom
McDoom

I watch Wipeout because I'm hoping Jill Wagner is wearing something slutty. We're waiting Jill...

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