Lance Armstrong's Comeback Was, Like Most of 'Em, An Epic Failure

Categories: Lance Armstrong

Lance Armstrong.jpg
Got the dreaded Tweet from Lance Armstrong last night:

Thanks for all the messages on retirement 2.0. And thanks for ALL the support the past 2.5 yrs. Onward!

Retirement 2.0 means two things: 1. The greatest cyclist who ever lived is done riding professionally. 2. His comeback that I was so damn giddy about in 2009 was a failure.

Well, wasn't it? I thought Lance would triumphantly return to win another Tour de France and, in the process, shut up those who still hound him trying to prove he used performance enhancing drugs.

In the end, he did neither.

In 2009 Armstrong finished third in France and last year he crashed early and often during the race.

And the rumors? Still there -- stronger than ever, actually.

Last month he finished 65th in a race in Australia and all his Tweets the last six months have been about kids this or kids that and barely a peep about him and his bike. Saw it coming. Doesn't mean we have to like it.

At 39, Lance Legstrong retires with a record seven Tours and millions touched and helped by his Livestrong foundation. The sad part: Even though the kid from Plano East Senior High has stopped pedaling, those with drug rumors and world-shaking agendas haven't.

A buddy of mine offered this morning that Lance was quitting now because he knew he could no longer out-run the truth. Granted, the next big headline about Armstrong will be a bad one.

This also got me to thinking that most sports un-retirements don't work out. Magic Johnson. Michael Jordan. Bjorn Borg. Martina Navratilova. Deion Sanders. Priest Holmes. Despite great results on the mound, even Roger Clemens wishes he would've stayed put.

Pete Sampras and John Elway, take a bow. You're two of the few who got it right.


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18 comments
Mishon
Mishon

why is the ticket obsessed with david kunkle?

ParleyPPratt
ParleyPPratt

The media myth of the guy who retires at the top of his game is just really a story about a guy who quit before he left it all on the field...

ParleyPPratt
ParleyPPratt

Jordan's first retirement comeback was a rousing success, actually...

jamal
jamal

Yeah, the fact that he's 39 has nothing to do with it. It's all about these headlines we've been waiting on forever. Your buddy's a hater.

Judge_Softy
Judge_Softy

Corby should do a remix of "Give It To Me, Lance," but change the ending to "Is that blood...doping?"

Hack
Hack

So let me get this right. In a sport more drug corrupted than Barry Bond's neck muscles, where everyone was cheating, the ONLY guy who didn't cheat was the one who manged to beat all the cheaters- 7 times!

Right.......

kergo
kergo

Hmmmmmmmm, bicycling.....mehhhhh. Maybe with Lance's retirement, all you people will now get back on the bike trails and leave the roads to, get this, cars! Also, take that stupid uniform off, when I play whiffleball I don't dress up in full Rangers gear. My neighbor gets all the gear on and then bides his "Pee Wee Herman" bike for, like, 10 minutes. Enough already. You can take off the yellow shirt now, the only thing you won is the "fatty" contest.BTW, I'm dressing up in full track outfit to go jogging-and later I'm going to dress like a pilot cause I'm gonna drive by the airport.

Scruffygeist
Scruffygeist

Post football boredom is my guess. Same reason every time I attempt to listen to the Fan I hear a chick on air. Top 5/Bottom 5 temperatures was preferable.

Dmkergo
Dmkergo

His association with the Ticket's #1 bit/segment makes him part of Ticket lore.....therefore worthy of praise and "obsession". Anyone who could fight through that line of questioning by the hungry hugger, is a good man.

Bill Lumbergh
Bill Lumbergh

In Sampras' case, he got lucky to finish on top. No question that he was no longer at the top of his game when he retired.

Richie Whitt
Richie Whitt

I know it's almost to believe. But for a change I wanna believe.

G_David
G_David

Hmmmmmmm. Maybe a Prozac, a nice bowl of ice cream and a Snuggie for you. It's going to be okay.

Mishon
Mishon

Never said he wasn't a good man...just tired of the ticket eating his ass.

Dmkergo
Dmkergo

sounds like SOMEONE'S been there!

kergo
kergo

what? do strong?

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