Cirque Du Soleil OVO: My Top 10 Observer-ations

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Next time you're bored try some Slackwire. And, please, send me the video of you wiping out.
10. Just seeing the intricate structure -- erected in the Dr Pepper Ballpark's parking lot in Frisco -- is impressive. Calling it "The Grand Chapiteau" might be a little hoity-toity, but it's neato nonetheless.

9. Let's get this out of the way up front because I know it's a prerequisite to even considering it: Yes, they sell alcohol. And, yes, there is a halftime.

8. Don't let the sequined leotards and the vulva-driven flyer fool you -- "An immersion into the teeming and energetic world of insects" -- at the root of the show is athletic entertainment. Promise.

7. I'm known in some vicious circles as the P90x Douche, and after a 90-day workout program last summer I got to where I could do 25 chin-ups without stopping or puffing. But at this show a guy -- dressed in a dragonfly suit and called "Orvalho" -- does stuff even Jack LaLanne and Criss Angel can't fathom. He climbs atop a 10-foot pole with a hand-sized knob atop. He then does one-arm handstands, alternating between arms while getting airborne in the exchange. Then, swear, the guy lays his body out almost parallel to the ground. If I didn't know better I'd say it was one of those smoke-n-mirror YouTube videos. But it ain't.

6. The acts are fantastic, but the fluff of the show is annoying. The whole thing last two hours, with probably 45 minutes of actual wowiness. The rest is intermission or these dorky, silly hosts who buzz around trying to be funny and prompt crowd interaction while camouflaging set changes. It's kinda like watching the gymnastics floor exercise in the Olympics. The actual tumbling is entertaining, but it's the time-wasting, breath-catching prancing that turns us off to the sport.

5. There is a group of "Ants" that have more detailed dexterity with their feet than you do with your hands. These six women lay on their back and basically juggle plastic "corn" and "kiwi" with absolutely perfect choreography. Not one slip-up. Every move and motion was identical. In the end it was Ants juggling Ants who were juggling corn and kiwi. Sounds stupid, but it's actually impressive. Made me ponder how many hundreds or thousands of times each girl tried to perfect the routine, and then again to practice perfecting it in unison with five other women.

4. If at any time the show bores you, take a look around. It's Frisco. Betcha $1 you can't turn your head without spotting a MILF with DDs who arrived via SUV.

3. For me the show-stealer was Slackwire, a dude kinda dressed as a spider who basically did tricks while balanced on the old clothes line strung up outside your Grandma's house. It's a high-wire tight rope, but with slack in it. Oh yeah, and it's constantly lowering and raising, up to 15 feet in the air. It's upon this moving, slacking wire that the guy walks, runs, does a one-arm handstand and -- for the impossible climax -- rides an upside-down unicycle with his hands on the pedals. I'm sure I did a horrible job of explaining the act. And that's because I'm still not sure what I saw, other than I know it's wholly impossible.

2. Don't wanna spoil the finale, but to say the least I was disappointed what ultimately hatched out of the show's centerpiece -- a precious egg. Let. Down.

1. It's not as in-your-face athletically awe-inspiring as, say, a Roddy Beaubois coast-to-coast drive and dunk, but witnessing the refined, precise skills are worth the price of admission. At the very least, it's like the best of the best NBA halftime shows. At the very most, it's like nothing you've ever seen before. Because of a couple snow days, Cirque Du Soleil OVO runs through February 27. Mute your lazy and go have some fun will ya?

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J Michael Daniel Jr
J Michael Daniel Jr

I've been a member of their Cirque club through American Express and have seen almost all of their shows as they offer pre-sale discounts and primo VIP packages. I have even seen some of the Vegas shows on multiple occasions. The one thing that has always amazed me is that the performances are flawless. Of all the shows I have attended(at least 20) I have only seen one mistake and it was not even an accident causing injury. During their adult oriented show "Zumanity" two half naked chicks were swimming in an oversized martini glass and did this flip manuever and one of them went flying out. She fell a good six to eight feet to the stage but within a minute she was back in the glass to finish the routine.

As to the question gay or not gay? It's relative to the outcome. I'm hetero but taking a date to the show will guarantee post-date fornicality. So in some minds it's super-gay...but worked for me.

j mike is gay!
j mike is gay!

Thanks for referencing your imperialism through Amex (no REGULAR straight human does this!).....I call utter freakin' homo on this batch of dung. Call mom, get a ride and sleep the GHB off. Hey, he will still love you in the mornin', and you guys can douche out on the bike trail, and have $12.00 coffees.

ps-enjoy the cozy bike costumes; maybe wear a feather in that balding pate? ohhhhhhh, SO purple mardi gras crazy!

Kergo rocks.

J Mike the Great!
J Mike the Great!

Yesterday (spoken like Mr. Howell on Gilligans Island) Ovo and I went to lunch after his show, and he regaled me with tales of tights and fights and ohhhh, boogy nights! We just adore Fadi's in the mid afternoon sun-mmmmmmm. Then we rushed in my BMW to the Container Store and used my advanced chrome digital apoxy laden VIP Amex card to buy a condo in Highland Park, where we partied with Richard Nixons son (Dick JR), Richard Belzer, Country Joe Mcdonald, former secretary of state Madeline Albreight and the fat guy from Slipnot. Then we danced until near morn, and we took my hovercraft over Frisco (with our Diamond Cut jeans on-yay!), and bought the mall with my Amex card.

kergo
kergo

I saw J Mike with a vest tied around his neck yesterday at Stonebriar....we was wavin' his Amex card around and yellin' "look at me", "look at me!"; and I just prayed my wife could/would hurry up shopping, and I could be in the mountains in 3 hours.

kergo
kergo

I dunno who J Michael is, but, man he sounds like a ..............

ps-I agree, KERGO ROCKS!

Scruffygeist
Scruffygeist

Cirque in Vegas=yes.

Cirque in a parking lot=not so much

There's something about the Vegas environment that makes Cirque much better there than getting out of your car and seeing Ikea across the street. Mystique, O, Ka, all great shows there.

And those performers don't get enough props. Half the crazy shit they do could get them killed if they mess it up.

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin

Richie, we all know you were let down by the egg, because you thought, just like the grammy's, that Lady Gaga was going hatch from the egg! Going to Vegas next week, maybe Ill catch Cirque O, or viva elvis. Im tired of lookin at Frico frow, once they move out there they let themselve go a little, I enjoy playing eye darts with the nips of the uptown chick

Rooster
Rooster

Cirque Du Soleil; Gay or not gay?

just thinkin'
just thinkin'

only gay if your posting name is that of a barnyard animal that impregnates chickens

Rob_Em
Rob_Em

The last time I saw Cirque Du Soleil was probably five years ago. I always enjoy it, and I'm glad you wrote about it. Some of the stuff those folks can do just blows my mind. Couldn't the case be made that they're the best athletes in the world?

Or at least, the most athletic entertainers in the world (sorry, pro wrestling fans)?

And I agree, some of the weird stuff that goes into the show can be a bit much.

kergo
kergo

Dear ASK.COM, Are John Wylie Price and Ray Wylie Hubbard related? If so, does JWP hate the lake named after RWH? Does JWP get mad angry when someone refers to black bears? Does JWP get mad agitated when the Stars play the Blackhawks? Who is JWP? Does he eat? Uggggg, so many questions to ask and answer before it gets dark! Sorry?

midnitewriter
midnitewriter

But how does it compare to Cirque de Sirois ?

kergo
kergo

Really? You definitely bat left handed...no question now! What's next, wine tastings and decorating classes?

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