Whitt's End: 8.20.10

Categories: Whitt's End

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Whether you're at the end of your rope or merely the end of your week, welcome to Whitt's End:

*If Dallas Cowboys' quarterback Tony Romo gets hurt behind a patch-work offensive line Saturday night don't come crying to me. I don't think he should even suit up. There is exaggerated risk, and what exactly is the reward? Nothing Romo can do in San Diego will make me feel better about his chances of leading a win September 12 in Washington.

*It was about this time last year that the Texas Rangers' bats went limp. Consecutive home shutout losses to Oakland and the hint of a pennant race was gone. Four straight losses and a 22-26 record over the last eight weeks isn't good, but it won't happen this season. It's going to get scary before it's over, but ultimately the AL West is over.

*Aerosmith's Stephen Tyler will judge American Idol in place of Simon? I was intrigued by Howard Stern, but I now I'll continue my streak of never watching.

*The Cowboys are taking a train from Oxnard, California to San Diego. Outside a 30-minute-ish trip from Gatwick airport to London, I've never taken an extended train ride.

*Raise your hand if you trust Brandon Boggs? He's like the clumsy girl wearing sassy sandals in co-ed softball you stick out in right field and pray no one hits the ball to her. They're hitting the ball to Boggs, and it ain't pretty.

*General Skandar Akbar, rest in peace. Well, this is The Sportatorium. Right?

*Hot.

*Not.

*I've got a solution to all these bozos "earning" their 15 minutes of fame via televised car chases like the one that ended in Love Field Thursday. Drag the guy out of the car and beat him to death on the spot. Guaranteed you'll see a drop in fleeing suspects. Guaranteed.

*Anyone else shocked at how easy it was to drive onto the airport runway? One chain-link fence and, presto, ready for take-off. That can't be right, can it?

*Hate to profile too much, but the truck-chase event started when an undercover cop reported a "suspicious vehicle." Man, I see those every day. Hubcaps missing. Major dents. Erratic driving. Drivers that look, well, suspicious. Sometimes you can just look at a car and pronounce "guilty." Of something. In retrospect, I guess I don't mind profiling at all.

*Seriously, I hope Brett Favre gets "Theismanned" on his first pass attempt this season. Then, and only then, will we know for sure he's done.

*We knew Roger Clemens was lying all along. Right?

*So far Jorge Cantu and Cristian Guzman have been waaaay underwhelming.

*After seven years and 4,415 deaths of American soldiers, we're basically out of Iraq. And we accomplished ...? I guess eradicating Saddam and neutralizing those weapons of mass destruction and liberating an oppressed people should be considered "Mission Accomplished!" victories. But, then again, there were no WMD's and, oh look, a suicide bomber killed 61 men this week who were standing in line to sign up for the Iraqi army. Was it worth it? Remember, nothing good happens when you pull out too late.

*Are there people who actually think President Obama is a Muslim, or merely people who want to believe it?

*DISD school lunches this year will include salad, a hummus veggie plate, black-bean burgers and chicken and beef noodle bowls. I'm old enough to remember the four food groups: Carton of milk, slice of white bread, salisbury steak and apple sauce. Deelish.

*More cocky: Mike Rowe in his "Hey, I'm just a casual everyman" cap? Or the slick-haired Geico guy and ... his ... very ...dramatic ... speech ... cadence?

*I think I figured out what you guys want to hear from me: That I love George Dubya Bush, and God 'n Country above all else, and Bob Seger-ish classic rock, and all animals, and 'Merican-made cars, and home cookin', and guns, and cold beer, and mainstream sitcoms where the hot wife bitches about her fat husband. Oh yeah, and I hate homosexuals. That'd make you feel all comfy 'n cozy wouldn't it? So sorry to disappoint.

*This weekend? If you need me on Saturday I'll be at Duke's in Addison hosting a little Dallas Cowboys Pregame Show on 105.3 The Fan from 5-8 p.m. Don't - I repeat, do not - be a stranger. Sunday night I just might go watch this badass band at Verizon.


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