No-Hitter = No Biggy

By Richie Whitt Tue., Aug. 24 2010 at 8:36 AM

Categories: Texas Rangers

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I always TiVo the Texas Rangers. But last night when I got home my roommate already had the game on and when I got home I heard TV voice Josh Lewin exclaim:

"Hit record on your DVRs, you're about to witness history!"

Whoa, I exclaimed back, the possibilities running through my minuscule mind. Home run cycle? Four homers in a game? Double no-hitter? Ron Washington going an entire press conference without a subject-verb hiccup?

Nope. Just an almost combined no-hitter.

Yawn.

Don't get me wrong, what pitcher Rich Harden accomplished was fantastic. Almost seven innings and 111 pitches of no-hit baseball on a sweltering night in Arlington. Considering his last outing of less than three innings, it was as improbable as it was impressive.

But ...

A combined no-hitter just has a hollow ring to it, no? It's like climbing Mount Everest or running the White Rock Marathon - as part of a relay team. It's like tag-teaming the porn star.

I know it's never been done in Rangers' history and I guess it would've been significant. But, honestly, I'm more excited about the 4-0 win over the Minnesota Twins, the 8.5-game in the AL West and the magic number shrinking to 30.

Oh, and if you are one of the ones ripping Washington for not leaving Harden in, you don't deserve to be a baseball fan. Harden, remember, has a history of arm problems and was recalled off the disabled list early Monday. Having him throw 130+ pitches in pursuit of personal glory would have been a ridiculously horrible move.

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Baseball, Rich Harden, Ron Washington

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Considering that a combined no-hitter has only happened 9 times in baseball history I would say that it is noteworthy. Unlike porn stars getting banged by multiple times, it doesn't happen every single day.
Considering that a combined no-hitter has only happened 9 times in baseball history I would say that it is noteworthy. Unlike porn stars getting banged by multiple times, it doesn't happen every single day.
Other than the Rangers winning, I think Harden's peformance last night was the absolute worst possible outcome, as it will lead team management to falsely believe Harden has turned it around and recaptured his past glory. The reality of the situation, to all who know better, is he remains THE CLUB DOUCHE and he is going to continue to give us nothing but high pitch counts, excessive amounts of walks and an extremely low number of innings.
Other than the Rangers winning, I think Harden's peformance last night was the absolute worst possible outcome, as it will lead team management to falsely believe Harden has turned it around and recaptured his past glory. The reality of the situation, to all who know better, is he remains THE CLUB DOUCHE and he is going to continue to give us nothing but high pitch counts, excessive amounts of walks and an extremely low number of innings.
A one hitter works just as well. Mauer earned that hit anyway. I had no problems with Wash pulling Harden--one swing and it was a 3-2 game. Harrison was fireballing, I didn't know he could hit 98. Hopefully they can take 3 of 4 from Minny, start putting some home field pressure on them, and proceed to bury Oakland's chances over the weekend.
Washington was right to pull him. No use in having him back on the DL for a useless footnote stat. And those dudes are right roommate + grown man with professional job = questionable?????
Yes, we're roomates. We admit it. We're in love. Deal with it.
I for one was glad to see the Club Douche (CD) pitch so well, in fact Big Dumb Danny even called it yesterday during Ranger talk. And just like Danny said, he is always good in his first start off the DL (although not that good) its his second start that matters. so for you idiots wanting him to stay in, yet wanting him to do well the rest of the year, Warsh pulling him at 111 pitches was best for him and most of all for the TEAM. Ya'll would be blasting Ron if he left him in and then CD gave up a hit that was a HR. 1 down 3 to go against the Twinkies Oh yeah, so I guess Richie had that guy move in, did he bring the daughter too?
RW, you have a roommate?? GAY!! Does the Fan not pay enough for you to have your own place??? I dont know about you but being a grown man and having a roommate is super gay!
Aside from the comedy, the Rangers need to play catch up. Again they have a sub-.500 record against a division leader and are now 1-3 against these Twins. The good thing is Texas has plenty of games left versus the Twins to at least have a winning record against one division leader
Rich Hardon had a good performance last night. Hardon really drilled them in there, and located his balls really well. The men he faced really had a hard time laying wood on his balls.
Actually, a combined no hitter is somewhat exciting due its relative infrequency of occurrence whereas the porno star tag team reference is an attempt at clever simile that falls short due to its lowest common denominator lack of imagination. Rangers one hitter against the resurgent Twins is pretty impressive but not quite top billing due to Bautista sticking it to the Yankees last night.
Glad I got here before the rest of my self...Self might say....blah blah blah ranger collapse..blah blah blah..I just say fwarrrrrp..pfffffft..
"Richie's Shlong = No Biggie"
meow, meow..gagree with RW on this one..would've been cool no doubt, but a win is a win is a win..meow, meow..RW the only porn double teaming you would be a part of is in scott/rob m type porn..wouldn't be alot of girls on screen if you know what I mean..meow