St. Patrick's Day Parade: My Top 10 Observations

Categories: 'Tis the Season

Observer - St Pattys Girls.jpg
​10. Riding on the Dallas Observer float and catching a marshmallow that was hurled from a good 20 yards away in my mouth has to be in the top five of my all-time proudest athletic achievements.

9. Getting nailed in the chest with a honey bun. Um, not so proud. Touche.

8. I love the parade and the after-parties because it feels like the one day a year where cliques are disbanded and Dallas lets its superficial guard down. In a town that's all about what you drive and what you wear and where you sit, Saturday was a day you could be yourself and feel comfortable doing it. If your shades of green didn't match, eff it. Refreshing indeed.

7. That said, it was quite the daring look to show up wearing only a Borat-style, lime green sling. Props to the dude, though. It was pointed out to me that he had several lipstick kisses on his bare buttocks.

6. I saw floats featuring the Hare Krishnas and - swear - the U.S. Census. Or were the jello shots making me hallucinate?

5. I'd read all about the fire that gutted the four businesses in lower Greenville. I'd been to dinner twice at Terilli's in the last month and spent several days watching Texas Tech football at Hurricane Grill. But Saturday was the first time I'd seen the destruction in person. Devastating. The makeshift memorials on the chain-link fence almost brought a tear to my eye.

4. Props to The Granada. Even though it was a gorgeously sunny day outside, those guys know how to host a party.

3. Without rules and laws and peer pressure, we'd all return to the Paleolithic Era like that. I dunno, there's just something liberating about going to the movies and tossing your empty Milk Duds box on the floor. Same on Saturday, when no one looked twice as you swigged your beer out of a plastic red cup and then just sorta left it wherever in search of a new one. Thankfully, we now return you to your normal, civilized brand of humanity where trash cans are necessities, not distractions.

2. Don't have any official record-keeping, but I'm guessing Parade Saturday is Dallas' highest-grossing hook-up day of the year. Everyone wears green. Everyone has beer goggles. It's like we're all reduced to the lowest common denominator. You girl. Me boy. We kiss. Ugh. Chug.

1. The Manny Pacquiao fight drew 51,000 to Cowboys Stadium in Arlington Saturday night. The parade drew 80,000 to Greenville Avenue Saturday afternoon. Booze 'n Boobs > Boxing.

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