The Top 10 Bodyguards in Case of Zombie Apocalypse
Would the Bird Man make a good Wing Man?
Through the door. Crashing in the windows. Falling from the ceiling. Purgatory-confined, blood-thirsty zombies. Everywhere.
This hasn't happened to me in a while, but when it does I want an athlete to be my bodyguard. A big, scary, tattooed, pierced, fearless dude that has a chance to fight off the zombies and keep me from, ya know, being a dead man's dinner.
Couple of the Denver Thuggets have "the look", but I wonder if The Bird Man would make a good Wing Man? Nawwww, too skinny.
When the zombies attack, the guy I want at my side is ...
9. Dennis Rodman -Serious concern about him leaving his post to organize a zombie orgy.
6. Leonard Davis - If he can pull a horse out of the mud, surely he can tear a zombie limb from limb.
5. Rosie O'Donnell - Even zombies would be repulsed.
4. Brock Lesnar - Outlaw biting and I like his chances of forcing every zombie to tap out.
3. Ray Lewis - Stupid pre-game dance might confuse zombies, and I know he's not afraid to get his hands, um, dirty.
2. Wade Philips - As my last line of defense, zombies could feed on his ample carcass for days.
I suppose you think your zombie bodyguard can beat up my zombie bodyguard?