Whitt's End: 1.16.09

Categories: Whitt's End

Whitt's End - reaper.jpgWhether you're at the end of your rope or merely the end of your week, welcome to Whitt's End:

*My summation of Thursday's dramatic plane crash/rescue in New York's Hudson River: It's a bird! It's a plane! It's Superman!!

*Found it funny that, although the crash happened at 2:30, Larry King and his ancient suspenders were still talking about the details on CNN under a yellow "BREAKING NEWS!" banner at 8:30.

*To answer a couple of your questions, the way it's been explained to me is that The Ticket, by law, can't simply increase the strength of its signals. In fact, never will be able to. It has the capability all right, but if it cranked up 104.1 FM's power, for example, it'd drown out some poor saps on the same frequency in east Texas and the FCC would come a calling with a fine or a yanking of the station's license. So, in the words of a prominent Ticket staffer, "It is what it is. We're stuck."

*Crafty move by the Rangers' Michael Young. By initially reacting to the team moving him to third base by demanding a trade, only to later accept it, he'll further his legacy as a "team player" to mythical proportions. Too bad Nolan Ryan had to come in and clean up Jon Daniels' mess.

*Speaking of the Rangers, Daniels can be ripped for a lot of things, but as recently as 2007 Texas' farm system was ranked 28th by Baseball America. Yesterday it was ranked No. 1. If the Rangers want to create a buzz for Opening Day, they'll trot out 20-year-old Elvis Andrus to shorstop and 20-year-old Neftali Feliz to the mound. That'd jazz me a little.

*While the Rangers raise a banner for having good prospects in Arlington, despite all their failures the Cowboys still haven't stooped to celebrating a decent practice squad. Can you imagine?

*If I'm George Bush and I'd just orchestrated the last eight years, I bypass a farewell address and just slink out the back door of The White House hoping no one notices. You?

*Hot.

*Not.

*Prepare to be nauseated by Fox slobbering all over Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb and his "amazing revival" since being benched late in the season. Don't buy it. Remember, the Eagles failed to score a touchdown and lost at Washington on Dec. 21 in what they billed as their "do-or-die" game. Only by the grace of Tampa Bay blowing a 10-point, fourth-quarter lead to the lowly Raiders on the season's final Sunday did Philly even back into the playoffs. So let's just cool the heroic McNabb talk, shall we?

*Jason Garrett got passed over in Denver and now in Detroit. He's a finalist for the Rams' job. I'll be surprised if he gets it. Of course, I'm surprised he got this much interest in the wake of the Cowboys' offensive regression.

*Ya know, when I started The Master Cleanser I always envisioned my first meal afterward being like a scene right out of Oliver Twist. But, in reality, not that glorious.

*I know it's only mid-January, but damn I'm tired of Arctic Blasts! How long 'till Spring Break?

*You've read me in The Sportatorium and in the Dallas Observer. You've heard me on 105.3 The Fan. Now see me tonight at 6:30 on KFWD Channel 52. My visual presence can't be any worse than my written or spoken word, can it? Wait, don't answer that.

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