The Best Answers from Comics' Reddit AMAs

Categories: Comedy

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A Reddit Ask Me Anything (AMA) is becoming a standard stop for celebs whenever they have something new to promote, or just some time to kill. Even Obama stopped by once. But the President didn't say anything near as entertaining as the pros. Check out our favorite AMA answers from stand-ups and other famous funny people.

Eddie Pepitone

On why he quit smoking weed:

"Started getting panic attacks and started eating bundt cakes."

And on Kermit the Frog, who, Eddie claims, cut his scenes from The Muppets:

"That green fuck better watch his ass."


*****

Aziz Ansari
On angry, mistaken tweets:

"That happens A LOT. People tweet me like, 'Yo I just said hi to you in Austin, and you were a dick.' Meanwhile, I'm in New York. Indian dudes with beards, PLEASE CARRY YOURSELF IN A RESPECTABLE MANNER! I HAVE TO DEAL WITH THE REPERCUSSIONS OF YOUR DOUCHEBAGGERY!!!"

*****

Jim Breuer
When challenged to a game of Wiffle Ball by a Redditor:

"Dude, you don't want to take me on in Wiffle Ball. I'll videotape it, YouTube it, and you'll be embarrassed for the rest of your life. I'll send it to your grandmother. I'll send it to your boss. I'll strike you out before I throw a pitch."

*****

Mindy Kaling
On getting weird with The Mindy Project guest star Anders Holm:

"Sometimes I would lick Ander's arm the tiniest bit, like a garden snake."

*****

Colin Mochrie
When told about the years of speculation and giant list of blogs dedicated to his and Ryan Stiles' supposed off-screen love affair:

"Read a book."

*****

Kevin Nealon
When a Redditor confessed to nearly hitting Nealon with a Frisbee in the Boston Public Gardens about 20 years ago and asked if Nealon had forgiven him yet:

"No, I haven't. I still flinch every time a plate is put in front of me."

*****

Louis CK
On taking "dad pisses" -- the kind that take 15 minutes or longer:

"That starts happening right away because you're so busy you never get to piss. It's also why dads get kidney stones and prostate cancer and die. Because no one will let them NOT."


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