12 Great Parties Showing the 2013 Kentucky Derby in Dallas

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I love a reliable party. And gambling. And white linen, mint juleps, ponies, big hats, the look of relaxation that floats in wealthy people's eyes, ironed tablecloths and spontaneous hugging. The Kentucky Derby has all of those things, and has consistently showed 'em off since 1875. Bless its heart.

Dallas has a natural proclivity for southern celebrations, so there are plenty of places to don a bonnet and set of antique pearls this Saturday. Here's twelve that currently lead the formation.

Lee Park Conservancy Party -- Now in its fifth year, the Lee Park Junior Conservancy presents A Day at the Races. It's a big to-do, filling the Arlington Hall at Lee park with the city's most polished young professionals.

It's a traditional celebration, so you'll dress the part in a Kentucky Derby chic ensemble, while chomping on Southern cuisine, gulping Mint Juleps, fixing the Best Hat and Best Dressed Contests, hijacking the cigar rolling table, becoming the live entertainment, dancing with someone's husband, foiling someone's political asperations, and avoiding the silent auction because you're poor. Also, they're showing the races. Ticket prices keep out the commoners, and range from $75 to $150.
Odds of getting laid: 15:1

Think Ahead Group's Derby Party, featuring Petty Theft -- The Arboretum is the ideal backdrop for a Derby party, and on Saturday its DeGolyer Mansion houses a rager, organized by TAG (Think Ahead Group). The non-profit promotes brain health and research and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz (Whoa, sorry. I fell asleep reading about them.)

TAG promises the classics: Mint juleps, raffle prizes, southern cooking and Tom Petty(ish) music. You've got to get your tickets by Friday if you want to cautiously shake it with this crowd. They cost individual non-TAG-members $80.
Odds of getting laid: 19:1

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Sissy's Fried Chicken, Jockeys and Juleps -- Upscale without being pretentious, Sissy's throws a great party. There's no cover, just wonderful atmosphere and $7 specials on Sissy's Mint Julep, Kentucky Punch, Presbyterian Bourbon Press and Alabama Sunsets.

They'll show all of the derby action -- from The Red Carpet Special to the run for the roses -- up on the big screen. And yes, there will be a prize for best Derby outfit. (Better steam that hat, ladies.) It runs from 3 to 6 p.m. and Sissy's claims you don't need a reservation unless you plan to stay for dinner, which you know you will.
Odds of getting laid: 4:2

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