Samson's Hot Dogs "Wants You to Show Them You Weenie" (Sic) (Sick)

Categories: Food News

samsons_wiener_contest.png
Samson's Hot Dogs
Spelling is for chumps. Hot dogs are for dick jokes.
When you receive a press release that says, in all caps, "SAMSON'S WANTS YOU TO SHOW THEM YOU WEENIE," you simply cannot look away. It's not just the all caps, it's the "YOU WEENIE" part that really interests me. Was it the fear of using the wrong "your" in this piece that drove the artist to avoid it altogether and just go with "you?" Or is it a simple editorial oversight? If it is a simple oversight, what about the misspelling of the word "wiener" in the same art? Maybe we miss the "you"/"your" thing, but you'd think -- as a hot dog place-- we'd spell check for any hot dog euphemisms, especially the one we're using as the name of our contest, right? I dunno. Fuck me. Spelling is stupid.

Whatever. We live in a world where dictionaries have decided that "literally" now also means "figuratively," so let's just get to the dick jokes, right? I mean the "weiner" contest.

From the press release:

On August 22, Samson's is inviting customers to come on in and make their very own specialty hotdog with an opportunity for it to be featured on the restaurant's menu for the next year. For $5, guests will design and name their own hotdog, which will be posted to the Samson's Facebook page for a week.

The weenie with the most likes at the end of that time will be crowned the champion of Samson's "Show Us Your Weenie" contest. The winner will be announced at Samson's 1 Year Anniversary Party on September 27, and also receive one free hotdog per month for the next year.

And here's more glorious art from the press release. I desperately hope you earn the title of "Weenie Master Maker," which obviously means you're awesome at making wieners that control you.

samsonsdog2.jpg
Samson's Hot Dogs
Mmm. Weenie Master Maker.

I, for one, am going to do this. I'm going there, paying my five bucks, and making The Donginator (neon green pickles, mustard, Frosted Strawberry Pop Tarts as a bun). Your move.


Advertisement

My Voice Nation Help
7 comments
J_A_
J_A_

Finally the dicksterant we've been waiting for

CaffeineQueen
CaffeineQueen

I love this in so many ways. Excellent weiner reporting, Alice.

Mervis
Mervis

You know, for all the times that you've shown your box around town for our entertainment it would only seem fair that we could show our weenies at least one time.

flamencofestivaldall
flamencofestivaldall

The art of the weenie, wienie, weeny, wienerie is in the I of the Bee holder. Btw, our dogs do rock, see you their/there :-)

flamencofestivaldall
flamencofestivaldall

The art of the Weenie, Wienie, Weeeny, wieneries is in the I of the bee holder. Btw, our dogs rock :-) 

Now Trending

From the Vault

 

Loading...