Weekend Assignment: Send Us Photos of "Footlongs" (No Junk, SANDWICHES ONLY)

subway_footlong(JB).jpg
"Yes, could I get lettuce, unruly tomatoes, jalapeños..."

OK, it's Friday, let's have a little fun homework experiment for the weekend. This past week, the American judicial system was once again called upon to settle a manner of dire consequence. Subway has been accused of baking its signature "footlong" loaves a bit short of the implied 12 inches. After one intrepid sandwich sleuth captured a photo of a less than adequate sub, droves of others joined in the fun and then a few bold folks decide to take the fight to the courtroom.

According to this, Subway has released a statement saying that they're going to "ensure that every Subway Footlong sandwich is 12 inches at each location worldwide."

Before word has time to filter down to all the sandwich shops in town, I'd like to try an experiment and I desperately need your help. I snapped the above photo this afternoon (not whilst at Subway mind you, but let's pretend I've got a spine and say I was), and I need you to do the same. As you can kind of see, mine was a little bit more than 12 inches long. Did the corporate TPS report already make it to this particular Subway, or is this shop just the most overachieving operation ever? I can tell you by the pinch of lettuce that I received that it isn't the latter. Pro tip: Get lettuce and spinach, then you don't have to go through the rigmarole of saying "More lettuce please. A little more please. DEAR GOD, I WANT MORE THAN ELEVEN STRANDS OF LETTUCE WHY CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND!!!"

Once you have captured your assigned photo, send it to our email or tweet it to us (@cityofate). Now, I know some of you will snicker and say "I'll send you a photo of my footlong," to which I'll warn you: I've got Photoshop, and it's got a special "enshrimp" button on it. So sandwiches only, let's really just keep in mind all the victims out there who are suffering from insufficient sustenance. If we get some compelling evidence, maybe we can file a multimillion class action number against Subway. Or not. Please don't hurt m,e Jared.


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7 comments
kergo1spaceship
kergo1spaceship

Justin's blurb about subs equates to Eric's story about a car in a parking..........where is that fucking moderator  (the one I've never heard of, that's job it is to move shit along!) when you need her?  Ahhh hell, not even a 230 excavator could move this pile of drivel laden shite. 

danielslauren
danielslauren

Hi JB. Long time listener, first time caller. Does the same investigative-journalism strategy apply to six-inch (5 or 7-inch ??) sandwiches? 

J_A_
J_A_

Subway is so boring. I went with coworkers after a long hiatus and immediately remembered why I never eat there.

justinwbitner
justinwbitner

@danielslauren Of course it does!  I haven't seen a half-footer get properly measured there in quite a while, so it's entirely possible people are getting stiffed on the shorties as well.  

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