Best Biggest Gut Busters
Gut bombs frighten me. I have enough of a food handicap because of my line of work, but professions aside, I'm not so good with self control when it comes to eating. I've been known on more than one occasion to follow the Louis C.K. school of consumption mechanics: I don't stop when I'm full, I stop when the plate's clean, or I'm experiencing overwhelming pain.
Hope you brought your Pepto
Still, there's some appeal to mammoth dishes -- I think. They compel our inner desire to explore and conquer. They cater to our need to win.
Here are some of the "best" gut bombs served in and around Dallas. And by best, we mean biggest. Many of them taste like shit.
The Boomstick (pictured above)
Internet browsers from all over the country clicked the heck out of news stories when Rangers Ballpark announced the Boomstick. The two-foot-long link may have gotten more attention than Yu Darvish. It certainly got more attention than the Japanese pitcher's namesake hot dog.
The boomstick won this year's Best, "Are You Going to Finish That?" But don't stop eating now.
Snuffers Cheese Fries
Bring your friends
I tried to go all Man Versus Food on this one and came up way short. A large order of cheddar fries at Snuffers could feed Octomom's whole family and still provide leftovers. In fact it's so big and nasty, we asked owner Pat Snuffer to help us calculate the calories of one of these plates for our Embracing Gluttony feature. His response? Why would I do that?
Pecan Lodge's Hot Mess
What do you get when you pile everything at the disposal of a notable barbecue restaurant onto a potato the size of a football? Justin and Diane Fourton call the creation a hot mess. I call it caloric torture.
4024 Maple Ave., Dallas, TX