The 10 Worst Fast Food Trends of 2012

6. The Taco Bell Shell Made of Cool Ranch Doritos
After the great meat fiasco of 2011, in which Taco Bell's meat was discovered to be less "meat" and more ground gym mats or something, what did they do? They followed up their blockbuster 2012 release of the Doritos Locos Taco with a Cool Ranch version. It actually happened. It wasn't a dream.

5. KFC Philippines "Streetwise" Cheese Top Burger
This one deserves its own place on the list. We still have so many questions! What about cheese melted crudely on top of a burger bun is "Streetwise"? How do you eat it? Why didn't they put the cheese on the burger?

Domino's Japan
4. The Ridiculously Expensive Delivery Pizza
This is Domino's Prestige Quattro pizza, which is not a sequel to the 2006 Hugh Jackman film. It had snow crab, truffles, some fancy-ass pork and it cost $50 (U.S.).

3. The Grand Canyon Burger at McDonald's
Japan McDonald's bizarre Big America 2 campaign, which featured four Hulk-fist sized America-themed burgers (the "Texas 2" burger featured "flavors of the Lone Star State with spicy chili beans"). We'll look past those for a minute to marvel at the absurd, looks-like-it-was-built-by-a-stoned-high-schooler Grand Canyon burger. It's got egg, mozzarella, cheddar cheese and steak sauce with soy and liquid smoke.

2. The Star Wars Burger Line, Including the "Dark Vador"
So here's what you're looking at: The Frenchy-Belgiany fast food chain Quick, in honor of the Star Wars: Episode One Phantom Menace Shit Show in the Three Dimensions released earlier this year, created burgers with a dyed-pitch black bun. As Yoda would say, disgusting, this looks.

Pizza Hut U.K.
1. Pizza Hut's Crown Crust Pizza & Hot Dog Stuffed Pizza
Well, you win, North Texas-based Pizza Hut. With this many ridiculous entries on the list (global ones at that), we have to crown crust you as the winner. Specifically, we recognize Jabba the Pizza Hut for the following two releases:
1. The Crown Crust Pizza, which had a crust made of tiny burgers.
2. The Hot Dog Stuffed Crust Pizza, which had a HOT DOG STUFFED CRUST. And, as you can see, the mustard drizzle.

Congratulations Pizza Hut Worldwide for adding greatness to our world. Now, with that said: Mayor Mike, what can we do to get Hot Dog Crust Pizza over to Dallas?

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You forgot Burger King's ice cream with strips of beacon in it. Eww and they are still selling it.


I don't see how most of these things are trends, aside from the stuffed pizza and the waffle breakfast sandwich. It's not like either of those things are super new, though.

Tim Smathers
Tim Smathers

And don't forget to put a fried egg on top of it!


Nick, you and I and everybody in the world knows that you would eat the shit out of a "Dark Vador" burger. Kindly stop fronting. 

Ooh, also, what about a Yoda burger with a green bun? Avocado, maybe? Or just leave it out for a few weeks? 

Ihatetoast Katy
Ihatetoast Katy

they're advertising the return of the double down on tv here (australia).

primi_timpano topcommenter

Has there ever been a good fast food trend?

Myrna.Minkoff-Katz topcommenter

Dear God!  Please deliver us from wretched, horrible, disgusting pizza in 2013!


@BrandonAKrueger Maybe not the lobster. I'd prob just take the lobster out and eat it alone. Then again, fast, not-fried seafood scares me.


@BrandonAKrueger I'd be sick for days after eating any of those. I do however love the terms, Taco Hell and "fancy ass pork pizza"!


@BrandonAKrueger Haha! I must know, which of those do you think are awesome. (cc @cityofate)

TheCredibleHulk topcommenter

I cannot fathom the hot-dog stuffed crust pizza. If I want a hot-dog, I'll eat a hot-dog.

Why would someone want a hot-dog shoe-horned into a pizza?


How about spinach? Works for green tinted pasta.

kplo moderator communitymanager

@Mark Rosenzweig I don't understand how I could've missed that one myself.

TheCredibleHulk topcommenter

@nick.rallo @TheCredibleHulk 

Having given this a bit more thought, I'm guessing the pizza trends that I find repugnant might seem delightful to someone in the 7-14 year old pizza-eating demographic. Which, I suppose, is who most of these "novelty" pizzas end up feeding.

Which in turn explains why Pizza Gut and their ilk have not received a dime from me in, oh, say 30ish years.

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