Gawker's Fruit Rankings Are Terrible So I Made My Own and They're Much Better
Gawker is actually ranking fruits. How pointless is that?
If I were rich I would hire a part-time mango preparer, with the potential of going full-time.
Let's break down their rankings and rank the fruits of the world ourselves.
27. Fig 26. Date 25. Honeydew 24. Papaya 23. Cantaloupe 22. Blackberry 21. Pear
Terrible, right? The strawberry, blackberry, raspberry and plum are obviously too low, while the top 10 is marred by the presence of the lime, the orange and the banana, all serviceable but by no means indispensable fruits.
Here are the correct rankings. Like Gawker, we claim the following to be infallible. Unlike Gawker's, ours actually are.
Also receiving votes: Figs, grapefruit, guava, lemon, dates***, honeydew
*I heard once that bananas constipate you, so I haven't had one since 2006. But I hear good things.
**Mango would be No. 1 if it wasn't so much damn work.
***Dates wrapped in bacon are definitely in the top 10****.
****I guess that's true of pretty much everything.