I Fucking Love Thanksgiving

Categories: Holidays

cranberry sauce can.jpg
Mmmmmm. Stumpy, ribbed sauce.
I fucking. Love. Stuffing. Thanksgiving, I'm so fucking thankful that you invented meat cobbler.

Stuffing.jpg
Stuffingaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhlovestuffing.
Oh, did somebody make that stupid ass green bean casserole with the crunchy onion things from a can? Good. Because I fucking love that shit.

greenbeancasserole.jpg
Don't knock green bean casserole. That shit's awesome.
And you know I love Second Thanksgiving Dinner sandwiches (which are traditionally eaten about three hours after First Thanksgiving Dinner and then for every meal until all the leftovers are gone) on white bread with stuffing and turkey and cranberry sauce.

Thanksgiving-Leftover-Sandwich.jpg
Thanksgiving Sandwich is everything that's wonderful about Thanksgiving in portable form. It's epic good.
Have a happy Dang Turkey Day, fools. I wish you all the most delicious of meals and many, many turkey sweats.

Follow City of Ate on Twitter. Follow me at @thecheapbastard.



Sponsor Content

My Voice Nation Help
23 comments
Montemalone
Montemalone topcommenter

This must be the "Yes Virginia, There Is a Santa Claus" but for Thanksgiving.

Pull it out every year and read it around the table, sorta like a prayer that you make it through the meal without telling your relatives to just die.

immagringo
immagringo

can you still fit into a normal sized office chair?    if you do.. can you get out of it without slipping the armrests from around your love handles?

immagringo
immagringo

man, what a mainstream, normal rockwell pos article with nothing relevant taking up precious bandwidth.

LaughAtWhitney
LaughAtWhitney

Yes this article is REALLY that funny. I would argue pee-your-pants funny.

CitizenKane
CitizenKane

I am so with you on that sandwich..............you prefer Hellman's or Mayo, but F the whole grain bread...... Pepperidge Farm white bread is best for a turkey samy.

Twinwillow
Twinwillow

I fucking love Thanksgiving! Best holiday we celebrate.

kergo1spaceship
kergo1spaceship

One big MEH!!!!!!!!!!

 

Guess your "I love fucking..." headlines have lost their luster. 

ChrisYu
ChrisYu

Paul Crume didn't have to drop an F bomb to start a tradition.

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin topcommenter

I loved it last year, and I feel the same way again this year.  this makes me want to plow my face into the green bean casserole as if I was bobbing for apples, come up for a gasp of air, and dive face first into the stuffing

thecheapbastard
thecheapbastard

@annaherself @nickrallo I was thinking more like demanding that the Girl Scouts sell their cookies year-round, but that works too.

immagringo
immagringo

@LaughAtWhitney    doesn't take much..  sounds more like incontinence to me..  better get that checked out... may be a precursor to something more detrimental.

hithard45
hithard45

 @kergo1spaceship

 All she did was take stock photos and write "fuck" everywhere. Real classy writing. I bet she is a real doll in person. It's like a small child who just discovered cuss words wrote about Thanksgiving.  "Fuck" really loses its impact if used in every other sentance. Then again the Observer pays her for this so I dont know whois  a bigger fool; the Observer, for paying her, or me for actually reading this.

nickrallo
nickrallo

@thecheapbastard @annaherself Annnnd I changed it back. #couldntlivewithitactually

cheapbastard
cheapbastard

 @CitizenKane I prefer Hellman's. Real mayo.

 

Although, I don't have a hatred for Miracle Whip. I think Miracle Whip has its place: Miracle Whip on a bologna sandwich is the perfect rock-bottom moment.

thecheapbastard
thecheapbastard

@nickrallo @annaherself Hey, Anna-- Can we bully more people into stuff? That was quick.

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin topcommenter

 @cheapbastard  @CitizenKane drunken 2 am rummaging of the fridge is when the perfect bologna, kraft cheese single and miracle whip sandwich is made, usually on a hamburger bun bc I dont want to waste my wife's bread for her lunches on that snack

Now Trending

From the Vault

 

Loading...