The Cheap Bastard's Ultimate Guide to Eating like a Total Cheap Bastard in Dallas

RoaminCadillac

Amazetits.

I have a new word to use.

Melissa Love-Tristan

Kung Fu Dairy Queen!!!

GregMDL1978

That's Dr. McDonglick to you, Ms. Laussade. The Chili's gig was for the free drinks and the cute bartender. Now please, lay off the crack pipe. It greatly exacerbates bipolar disorder.

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great set of list thanks for assembling it

Lastangelman

ALICE! .... you're the greatest !!!!

DallasSubserver

BEST FOOD-WRITEUP EVER. Alice Laussade, I wanna kiss your tongue for speaking such vulgarities so candidly :P"

Just

Holy crap, I'm so hungry right now I might have to make my husband put on pants and take me somewhere to eat.

primi timpano

Don't need panys for the drive through.

Mandy

wow.... looks like i need to add some things to my bucket list!

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Sotiredofitall

Just stupid

Chuck G.

Come to 'TC Shaved Ass'--"We'll dry-razor your ass in no time, and shave you a buttload of money."

Paul

Dairy-ette says it all ... better like mustard if you order it on your burger

Forrest

1. Well done on the article2. Still laughing 3. Great tips that I am already using - the bologna sandwich at Maple and Motor is bangin'!

mark zero (Jason)

There's boobies & stuff hidden in that placemat word search. (I think this should be a recurring feature)

JOSHUA

I just got outta Medical City from a triple bipass and a stent operation, got a belly wrap, and stoked up on 60 mg Lippitor....so now I hit the ATM for $400 skins and am headed out to do the entire list in one weekend. Send the flowers to Restland or a contribution to the Parkland Hospital Doctor's Lounge coffee fund.

amy

Taj Express is the shit!

brian

Great list of spots to his in Dallas...but I'm not entirely sure what makes it a list for cheap bastards...

Great article. for some reason it makes me want to over cuss to convey how awesome it is.

Nick R.

And now, there's a Cheap Bastard sentence generator: http://www.dallasobserver.com/...

A Marks Powers

Congratulations on your nomination/award, Alice, well deserved... http://cravedfw.com/2011/03/21...

primi timpano

Congrats, but our Alice don't need no stinking trophies. She's our Alice and she kicks major league ass.

Royalty

No cheap sushi places....we all don't want to die in our own lard. Disappointed. A typical hipster list.

Mervis

1 Like

Maybe try actually reading the whole story Royalty before commenting.

Page 3

Kazy's Gourmet9256 Markville DriveEverybody please keep going to freakin' Steel and stupid Kona Grill so I can keep being the only person in line at Kazy's Gourmet getting sushi rolls for $2 each that are likely made with the same fish they're serving you at your favorite hippest, coolest, all-the-rage mega fancypants Dallas sushisteraunt. This Japanese market supplies fish to many local sushi restaurants. You can get sashimi grade fish here for an at-home sushi night, plus they have giant fridges and freezers full of fresh quail eggs, tubs of made-on-site wasabi, roe, potstickers and all kinds of fun sodas. I just bought five rolls and six pieces of sushi for 20 bucks. Sushi boom.

primi timpano

Sushi kiosk at the Super H is also great and reasonably priced.

I'm not worthy, I'm not worthy!

Such an awesome article and list. Many of my favorite spots with plenty more to try out. I think above all, thank you for getting in some real gems outside of the city center. We live in Dallas and while we've got to fucking drive to get anywhere, there's still a lot of great hidden places.

Great list, however NOTHING will ever replace Metro Diner. I know there's an OC location, but I haven't been. Also, J's Breakfast and Burgers and Dallas Diner and Donuts should be on this list as well.

Mrs Esterhouse

Metro over off of davis/hampton has chicken fried steak hash, toast and 2 eggs every sunday for $6.50Cosmo's half priced pizza on SundaysLibertine half priced food TuesMeridian Room half priced food WedsLee Harvey's half priced burs Weds and $1 taco MonBryan Street Tavern half priced wangs on Wed and I think a pizza deal Tues*if you're stuck in Northpark for whatever reason, McCormick and Schmick has a really cheap happy hr menu- $4- 1/2lb cheeseburger and I had mussels for around $6 and calamari for around $5.... tons of stuff on their happy hr menu

just some other deals off the top of my head

Daniel

Good places all, but hipster-approved joints don't count.

gabbahey

Alice, I think I luv u.

Me.

Robert S

BIG MAMA'S Chicken and Waffles:

This place is NO JOKE – the BEST fried chicken in the ENTIRE world. – CASH ONLY too. I have been going there for years. I have introduced quite a few people to Big Mama’s – all fans to this day. The last time I went was a Sat afternoon – we grabbed our order and turned it in to a tailgate party/picnic – that was the day I made the wife and kid fans of BigMama’s.

Greg McDonglick

Jesus fuck, I wasn't hungy until I read that.

jonnyguitar

This article was really funny.

Missmaei

drove by Seafood Shack earlier, it looked closed, there was tape around the parking lot, hope it's a remodel and I am wrong, love that dive

Alice Laussade

UPDATE: According to @JaimesonPaul , this: "@thecheapbastard good news! Seafood Shack was up and running this morning when I drove by. Crisis over.”

When I go to Cinemark 17 next, I'll confirm this serious research.

Mervis

Used to go there when I worked up there. We called it the Fisheria.

Alice Laussade

Like.

Alice Laussade

I just called them. Says their mailbox is full. I was happy that the number wasn't disconnected, though-- more research will be done.

Alice Laussade

By the way, if they're closed, I'm going to have to have a fundraiser to get them to open up again. I would cry many cries if I learned that the combo platter I had at Seafood Shack last week was the last one I'll ever have there.

primi timpano

It would be a crying shame. Some of the best soups in Dallas.

Missmaei

phone no worky for SS either, Hope I'm wrong, love their oysters

twinwillow

Hmm, Just had lunch there Monday.

twinwillow

Love the list! Most are on my regular rotation. As a matter of fact, I had lunch at La Banqueta today. Suadero Torta with onions and cilantro and a gallon of green sauce. $5.00! Yummo!