Coconut Water Tastes Like Bed Bath & Beyond

Categories: Complaint Desk

Coconut Water.JPG
In 2009 the New York Times ran an article describing a trend taking over the city. Various shops were selling young coconuts, with undeveloped shells, liberated of their tops and served with drinking straws. "I think it's stylish, it's pretty," said a Brooklyn shop owner who was selling cases of coconuts a day at the time.

Only a few years later and coconut water has gone viral. Health benefits are touted; beverage companies market the liquid as a sports beverage, nutritional supplement, hangover cure and essence of life. Scores of companies are bottling the stuff, tinging it with pineapple and other fruit flavors and selling it in boxes, cans and plastic bottles.

Recently I saw several varieties for sale at the Whole Foods on Lemmon. I wasn't exactly excited to dive in. I was in grade school the first time I drank coconut water. I grabbed a drill out of the garage and set forth on a brown, hairy orb I'd talked my mother into purchasing at the grocery store, determined to get at the nectar inside. What resulted was perhaps an ounce or two of murky liquid littered with flecks of coconut flesh and tinged brown from shell fragments. It was gross.

The younger nuts produce a more abundant and sweeter liquid, but still: This stuff tastes like shampoo smells. The side of my container of Zico-brand coconut water said the package contained more potassium than a banana, but I don't care. I'd rather eat seven bananas and drink regular water than force down this stuff. Given the choice between enduring a hangover and consuming 12 ounces of premium coconut water, think I'd rather go back to bed.

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19 comments
DNA
DNA

Coconut water isn't new. Humans have been consuming these during the entire course of our evolution. It's probably why people like canned and bottled drinks so much ...

fruitlush
fruitlush

Coconut water has been used for its rehydrating and energizing benefits to the human body. I have also heard of many people who have been using it as a remedy for hangover. Although most people love the taste of coconut water, most of them do not know how good it is for the body. Articles like this one though helps educate people on how healthy and beneficial the liquid of the fruit is to the human body.

Sotiredofitall
Sotiredofitall

One thing to be aware of when using coconut water is that drinking too much can have a laxative effect. This characteristic of coconut water may or may not be desirable depending on the normal frequency of bowel movements.

Love hipster food fads.

primi timpano
primi timpano

Tried Zico at SxSW from a give away ice bucket at San Jose.  Tasted like ass.  Spit it out and threw the rest away.

cp
cp

Zzzzzz...... ever watch The Onion News Network on the IFC?

cocoNut
cocoNut

wake up douche..coconut water is the bomb

Nic Rodriguez
Nic Rodriguez

I read an article in Esquire a while back about mixing drinks with coconut water. Well, I tried this last year at the ACL Festival. Maker's Mark and coconut water is awesome. The next day, I wasn't hungover...but I did have a wicked case of the whiskey sweats.

Mervis
Mervis

"I think it's stylish, it's pretty,"

Sums it up.

Chris Danger
Chris Danger

I drink the coconut water you buy in cans at the asian supermarket. It works wonders w/ when I get headaches and also helped me out when I had the flu awhile back...

twinwillow
twinwillow

I've been drinking coconut water every day for a few years. The  major health benefit is that it's very hydrating because of the very large amounts of electrolytes and potassium like Gatorade but, without the sodium! Coconut WATER is 100% natural.It's perfect for "hangovers" or after eating a heavy sodium laden meal. Excellent too for re-hydrating your body after a sweaty workout or if you've had food poisoning or a bad case of the "runs". From the top or, the bottom. It's expensive because of it's popularity but, you can buy some brands at Fiesta for a fraction of the price of Wholefoods and other stores around town. I like the T.A.S. brand at .79 cents a can.Usually .59 or .69 a can when on sale. Most coconut water comes from Brazil and the Philippines. Just be sure to buy 100% pure (unsweetened) coconut WATER without any additives whatsoever. Your body will thank you.

TLS
TLS

But does it taste better than vomit?  Because if I have a hangover I'm pretty sure a case of coconut water would be more pleasant than my insides on the outside.

CitizenKane
CitizenKane

Out of curiosity I tried my 1st bottle of coconut water last week....the product was "pure coconut" water, no added ingredients......IMO it takes pasty and not thirst quelching like water.  Not worth the price of admission !

cp
cp

ball sweat

DoubleOJoe
DoubleOJoe

Why do you think that too much potassium is better for you than too much sodium?  Our bodies need both to function properly.  Too much of either is bad for you.  Your posting sounds like you just read the marketing bumph on the back of the can, and are trying to justify to yourself the huge sum you've spent on this fad.

CitizenKane
CitizenKane

Don't believe all the hype.  It is high in sugar content, high in sodium, and high in expense.  And purchasing off brands doesn't buy you quality assurance in any of the manufactuer's claims.

Another trend food ripoff that won't last......my recent trip to NYC indicated the whole designer "bottled water" trend at the dining table is a gonner.

BTW, "beef cheeks" are the new it food item in NYC.

Uptown uppie
Uptown uppie

I wouldn't go around telling people you know what "ball sweat" tastes like.

Mervis
Mervis

Watch The Onion video and you will understand cp's comment.

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