Sweet Sue Diner: Friendly, Cheap and Lots of Thongs -- That's a Sue to Love

Categories: Cheap Bastard

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Alice Laussade
Each week, the Cheap Bastard goes looking for a new place to eat a meal for less than nine million dollars. This week, she's full of sugar at Sweet Sue Diner, 3813 Bird St., 469-734-1864. At least, we think it was sugar. Something beginning with an "S" anyhow.

Other times in my life I've heard someone yell "MY THONGS!" over and over this many times when they weren't singing "The Thong Song": 0

Sweet Sue Diner is located right next to a McDonald's parking lot on Bird Street, near Baylor Medical Center. Not only does it have kick-ass murals painted all over its building boasting "burgers, pizza, subs" and "LUNCH SPECIALS," but there's also a giant dry-erase sign out front that says, "In and out in 10 mins!" and "BLUE BELL ICE CREAM." Sweet Sue's diner is yelling so many things at you, you have to go inside and check it out.
Inside, the gigantic picture menu is conveniently glued to the wall, just like at a fast-food restaurant. No item on the menu gets a detailed description beyond the basic "cheeseburger," "pizza" and the "Brooklyn bacon hotdog combo" (also the name of a sex move you shouldn't attempt if you haven't stretched).

Since the board outside also said, "Everything (with "Made" erased) Fresh," I ordered the chicken-fried steak sandwich combo. That's sandwich, seasoned fries and a drink for $6.99. When it arrived just three minutes later, the chicken-fried steak was perfectly hockey-puck round and the fries were perfectly uniform too. Definitely fresh, y'all. Fresh from a box.

Do I care? Hell no.

The sandwich was just as good as something I could've gotten at a burger chain, but the atmosphere at this place was a bajillion times better.

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Exhibit A: The lady at the window -- let's call her Sue -- was awesome. Sue made sure I had everything I needed, she refilled napkins at my table for me, asked me how my day was -- she was actually really fucking sweet. Which is why I move that she change the name of her restaurant to "Really Fucking Sweet Sue Diner."

Exhibit B: Another diner had this actual conversation with someone on her phone while I was there: "Oh, I'm glad you called back because you won't belieeeeve this shit. All my underwear is ruined. Yep. All my cute thongs. There were either crayons in her pocket or fake nails. Everything's fuckin' ruined."

Cheap food, over-the-top-nice service and lunchtime stories about thongs?! Oh, hell yeah, I'll be back, Sue.

Follow City of Ate on Twitter. Follow me at @thecheapbastard.

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14 comments
ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin

the question is, was the thong lady even remotely good looking, or was she of the high ass or shelf ass affliction.  I need to know howfucking great the breakfast is

brkinspdr
brkinspdr

The window of my office sits 20 yards from Sweet Sue's front door. I was excited that something other than Mickee Dees and over priced BBQ was moving in. I however have been disappointed by Sue many times. I suspected the food would be out of a box and failed when the owner told me all about his new easy bake oven that could cook things in minutes and that he had no plans of deep frying anything. Rumor has it that Mickee Dees is trying to buy that entire block and build a newer better bigger store. The problem is that Sweet Sue's owner has a long term lease and the landlord can't come to terms with them on a buyout. Baylor cafeteria is still the best option around here.

Nic Rodriguez
Nic Rodriguez

Shelf ass is a good thing, right? Like ass you can set a drink on? Maybe that's just the Latino in me. Nothing wrong with a lady being heavy south.

Kergo 1 Spaceship
Kergo 1 Spaceship

You are RIGHT ON with the "over priced BBQ"..........Dallas is king of overpriced BBQ!  It's bad that we have to leave town to get a good, cheap bite.  It's just BBQ. 

Ralphy
Ralphy

The Diceman always appreciatd a "shelf ass".....saying, it made a great spot for his ash tray while doing the doxxy.

ScottsMerkin
ScottsMerkin

shelf ass is ok if the rest of the body is good, I was thinking more along the lines of was she in a pink XXXL sweatsuit wiht 3" fake nails, and her weave pinned in with a hair clip

guest
guest

True, but is their BBQ "World Class"? Now, this right here is the question you need to be asking yourself...Oh, pardon me, but could you please pass me a few moist toilettes? I hate to be a burden.

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