McDonald's TV is Here. So, Five Local Programming Ideas.

mcdonalds_ad.jpg
McDonald's new phase of mind control and world domination is upon us: McTV is here. [ACTIVATE MIND CONTROL]

McDonald's is launching the "McDonald's Channel," according to the LA Times, The "digital network of exclusive original content targeted at dine-in customers" is called McTV, and it will include "local news and entertainment features." And, we're guessing, an occasional Big Mac ad, played while you're eating a Big Mac.

The invasion will no doubt spread to Texas (Phase 1 will begin at 800 stores in California). Once it does, we'd like to pitch some programming ideas that have a Texas-twist:

Troy Aikman's Angus Deluxe Toss
Twenty soothing minutes of Troy Aikman throwing a 1/3-pound, 100 percent Angus beef patty on premium bakery-style bun through a tire at Cowboys Stadium. In slow motion, of course.

Daily Weather With Chicken McNuggets
A tender, juicy Chicken McNugget delivers the five-day forecast using McDonald's various dipping sauces to indicate the severity in upcoming storms -- from Pure Honey (light showers) to Spicy Buffalo (severe t-storms).

Rick Perry Eats a McRib
Again and again for 22 minutes (accounting for McRib ads).

Most Eligible Ranch Snack Wrap
A reality show, based in Uptown, following the romantic adventures of Ranch Snack Wrap (crispy) as it tries to find the perfect mate.

Top Chef: McGriddles
The current season of Top Chef contestants compete over-and-over (show will loop every 5 minutes) in a quick-fire to make the best, gourmet McGriddle concoctions.



Sponsor Content

My Voice Nation Help
15 comments
Scruffygeist
Scruffygeist

Will all their programming include a well-dressed but hip urban educated black person just like the commercials?

Kergo 1 Spaceship
Kergo 1 Spaceship

How bout Richie Whitt as one of those gremlin things.  And Nap as the Hamburgler.  

TheRealDirtyP1
TheRealDirtyP1

I'm guessing "Super Size Me" won't make the lineup.

Daniel Hopkins
Daniel Hopkins

I'd like to see a judge show in which the Hamburgler is always the defendant.

Kergo 1 Spaceship
Kergo 1 Spaceship

Funny, but true. Is it sending the wrong symbol to that demographic?  

Josh's broken records
Josh's broken records

Nap is gonna hamburglar us a World effing Series! How's them Sawx doing Kergs, fired the manager..traded the GM..Pitchermen eat chicken, drink beera and play dem vidja games during a game..wowza?  Y'all have Salty, we have Nap Nap Winner...I'll take Nap! POW!

Nick R.
Nick R.

"All rise, the honorable Judge Filet-O-Fish"

Kergo 1 Spaceship
Kergo 1 Spaceship

Pow accepted!  It's a bad soap opera. Thinkin' about goin' to game five.  Out.

Kergo 1 Spaceship
Kergo 1 Spaceship

And BIG pandering is the worst kind of business marketing....like killin' ducks on a pond. Heck, they (MD's) were nearly dead a couple of years ago, and they found a way to exploit.  It's the great American way!  Ethics? I wish I were ruthless; I'd be a good rich guy.

Kergie out......hiking at Texoma w/the three year old. 

Now Trending

From the Vault

 

Loading...