Photo: Food Porn?

• Yeah. What Fuck Anonymous. Although for future reference, I think he or she meant "jibe", not "jive". Unless he actually was referencing a 4/4 dance step invented by African-Americans in the early 1940's.

• we love you alice. this dude is clearly a bitter prick. you are one of (if not the only) food critic on the observer staff whose personality consistently shines through everything he/she writes--from "official" posts to tweets. your taste in food doesn't always totally jive with ours but honestly, you are the shit nonetheless. you are a pleasure to read and the dallas foodie community is lucky to have someone like you among us. heart, your loyal fans/followers

• Dear Anonymous, And yet, you're still reading the reviews!! Apparently there IS something you find amusing or interesting or maybe you're really just a Foodie Reviewer Wannabe with a huge chip on your shoulder!! I've had to stop reading Alice's reviews in the morning because I'm sick to death of shooting coffee out of my nose. She is, indeed, hysterically funny. You, on the other hand, aren't. Maybe you should stick to the Public Library for your reading material.

• Don't listen to them Alice! I love your columns and can't wait for them to come out! I get sad when I don't see them in one week.

• Anon - If you don't like what Alice writes then DON'T READ HER STUFF. It's amazing how many people continue to read things on blogs that they don't like and then waste more of their time commenting. I for one will never again read an anonymous comment under an Alice post.

• She has a poster of herself by her bed!!??? Can't stand to hear the woman speak, now she is trying to be sexy? Barf!

• Really Alice I have wondered for quite awhile why the Observer keeps you around. I think it is virtually impossible for you to write anything beyond 1 sentence that isn't super gross. And the thing is, you don't sound all hip or cool or anything even remotely like that, in fact you remind of a friend of mine that never quite gave up her dreams of stand-up comedy. Now she is getting to an age where she is trying to hard to be "on" and funny and cool. That's how your stuff reads, like you are trying too hard to be that hipster-bullshit, too smart for her own good, oh she is SO funny type girl. It's sad really because it is having the opposite effect. Evolve my friend, you can't act like a 15 yr old boy forever.

• "You think she keeps a stick of butter on her bedside table?" The woman hasn't had a vaginal secretion since the Cold War. OF COURSE SHE DOES

• @Anonymous: Great. You just made my period cry. Thanks.

• SHE IS SOOOO ORANGE

• I truly despise all of your posts and writings. You are raunchy for the sake of being raunchy and it adds nothing to your content. This one is about as good as you get. I really hate it when you try to write one sentence about food mixed in with a bunch of other crap (see all of your food reviews). What is unfortunate about that is that the little mini write-ups are what I like best on this blog; yours always suck though. Before I get painted as some uber conservative, I am certainly not that. I like dick and fart jokes just as much as the next person and would say my sense of humor skews towards juvenile. In any event, I am sure you are a decent writer who somewhat understands or enjoys writing about food so I wish you would either take the initiative to actually try and write a few sentences without referencing your menstrual cycle (period jokes are funny; you are not), or that the Observer would rein you in a bit. End of rant...

• Paula Dean seems like a genuine person. And, I'm happy for her success. But like her food, I can only take a little at a time.

• Please! I'm trying to eat my lunch!

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