|We salute you, lazy asses!|
Independence Day is coming up and you're in charge of bringing dessert to the office potluck, the familyfest or the epic drinkathon with your friends. Screw making a flag cake. Instead, assert your right to pursue happiness -- lazy = happy in our book -- and bring one of these easy-to-make (and way more creative) confections from our list of Five Awesomely Easy Desserts for 4th of July:
Pop Your Independence Cherry Pies
So semi-homemade, we're thinking of getting a boob job and banging our way to the top so we can be even more like Sandra Lee. Bring these easy-peasy mini cherry pies to your 4th-stravaganza.
To make the yummy little pies, all you have to do is buy some pre-made mini tart shells like these.Then, make your own cherry pie filling or buy some ready-made and fill your mini tart shells to the brim. Warm 'em in the oven if you feel ambitious.
This dessert offers a lot of bang for your buck. Make some cupcakes. Sprinkle Pop Rocks on top. Commence fireworks frenzy of deliciousness.
While we're talking about Pop Rocks, here's a cool idea we saw on the Pop Rocks website: Rim your martini glasses with pop rocks instead of sugar. Mmm. More drink recipes from Pop Rocks here
"Fuck you, The British!" Twinkie Trifle
Are you too lazy to make the angel food cake and the sweetened whipped cream that your trifle recipe requires? Hell yeah. So sub in Twinkies and Cool Whip. They're way more American anyway.
Get yourself a giant clear bowl. Create a layer of Twinkies at the bottom. Then, a layer of Cool Whip. Then, a layer of strawberries and blueberries. Then, another Twinkie layer, another Cool Whip layer and another fruit layer and voila! Trifled.
Free yourself from hot-dog heartburn with a couple of these chocolate-dipped TUMS. There's simply no better dessert to follow up a day of binge eating.
Just melt some chocolate chips and dip in your favorite TUMS flavor. We especially like the tropical flavors. Dessert, plus calcium -- it's something your body needs anyway.
Fuck It Bucket
: Too much effort to make a dessert yourself? Bring a Fuck It Bucket (our favorite idea from Amy Sedaris' cookbook, I Like You
). Simply buy a bucket, write "fuck it" on the side and fill it with lollipops. Or Twinkies. Or brisket. Hooraaaaay freedom!!