Dallas Observer Names Noah W. Bailey Food Critic (Update: April Fools!)

Categories: (Un)sound Bites
noah bailey.jpg
Merritt Martin
New Dallas Observer food critic Noah W. Bailey, whose face is partially obscured to protect his anonymity.
After an extensive search, the Dallas Observer is proud to announce the promotion of Night & Day editor and frequent City of Ate contributor Noah W. Bailey to the position of food critic.

City of Ate readers are probably most familiar with Bailey from his biweekly contributions to Dude Food. Bailey's love of meat and potatoes and disdain for all things green, leafy and healthy helped set the tone for the column, and will inevitably mark a change in direction for the paper's food criticism.

Likewise, his folksy dismissal of the elegant cuisine and expensive restaurants he deems "rich-people shit" will give the paper an opportunity to focus on the kinds of restaurants and home-cooked meals more commonly enjoyed by our middle-class readers in these trying economic times. In his most recent Dude Food column, Bailey admitted that he has "never even been inside Bob's Steak & Chophouse [sic]" because of its prohibitively high prices -- yet did not allow that lack of firsthand experience to stop him from making fun of a restaurant consistently ranked as one of the top steakhouses in the country. We're proud to have a critic willing to go against the prevailing elitism that makes contemporary food criticism so inaccessible to the average reader.

After the jump, a few changes you can expect in the paper's food coverage.

Update: As many commenters correctly guessed, this was an April Fools' Day gag. 
 
Recipes
Each week, we will devote a column to one of Noah's own recipes, most of which involve bacon and a microwave. Interesting fact: He has never once used an oven.

Deep-fried vegetables only
The vegetables Bailey will eat are limited to onion rings and fried okra, so don't expect much commentary on sissy rabbit food like salads or squash.

A Year In Barbecue
Bailey plans to devote his first year of restaurant coverage to the exclusive coverage of barbecue restaurants. Think 52 straight 'cue reviews is excessive? Bailey says, "Go home, Yankee."

Noah Says No Way
Each week, Bailey will lay out an argument against a local restaurant, cafe, bar or food trend. In the crosshairs for his first month on the job are Spiral Diner, Dream Cafe, Whole Foods and veganism.

How It Looked Coming Out
Bailey will roll out a number of new features on City of Ate, the first of which is a weekly scatalogical slideshow entitled "How It Looked Coming Out."

Bailey welcomes your input in the comments -- unless you're some kind of vegetarian wuss.


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