Top 10 Most Annoying Diet Fads
|Wikimedia photo from Tagishsimon|
He was, by modern standards, a strange, obsessed and very annoying man. He fought against the dangerous urges married couples occasionally succumb to by advocating abstinence from sex and the hearty consumption of vegetables (which, presumably, would cure sexual appetite). He was convinced masturbation often led to death. He treated guests at his Battle Creek sanitarium to yogurt enemas. And he argued with his brother so vehemently over the recipe for their breakfast cereal (J.H. refused to allow sugar into the mix) that Will walked away with the company.
|Flickr user arincrumley|
|Tired of all that brown rice? Have another leaf of kale!|
Of all the diets, this may be the one with the deepest roots. It's often described as a mix of Asian philosophy and Western vegetarianism, a low fat and high fiber regimen concerned with natural, seasonal foods as well as their yin and yang. Macrobiotic diets are actually quite healthy--as long as people account for the lack of calcium and certain vitamins. What makes it annoying it the insistence that true happiness and well-being depends on it--and that people like Madonna follow it.
In the fall of 1988, Oprah wheeled 60 plus pounds of raw animal fat onto her set to illustrate the weight she lost following this liquid protein fast over a four month period. Yeah, she also jogged five or so miles a day, but that hardly mattered to viewers--although the makers of Optifast were publicly concerned with the "quick fix" message implied by her stunt. Yes, she could have lost just as much weight by snipping off some of that hair--and she wouldn't have gained it back as quickly. Simply put, anything Oprah does outside of her charity work is annoying.
Give Richard Simmons some credit. He was a fat young adult and not all that enamored of fad diets. Then he went and made the sensible program of moderation and exercise annoying. Even more annoying: turning calorie counting and meal planning into something cute--and highly marketable.
|Flickr user kimberlykv|
|Thanks for the diet crackers, Graham.|
Before Kellogg, there was Graham. The Connecticut preacher was convinced that a vegetarian diet would solve problems such as alcoholism and rampant sexual desire (which caused some otherwise decent couples to succumb more than a healthy once a month). And, since lust caused many diseases, or so he thought, vegetarianism would naturally make for a healthier world. He did, at least, leave us with Graham Crackers.
|Wikimedia photo from Arniep|
|Maybe Woody help his raw foodist friends mellow out.|
Normal fans of "raw foods" limit their reliance to a certain portion of their diet. Nothing annoying there. Extremists, however, are one strange bunch. Some refuse, for example, to drink bottled spring water as storage under unnatural conditions (artificial lighting) re-arranges the atomic structure...or something to that effect. The extremists are obsessed with purity, have a sense of self-righteousness that makes them annoying even to normal raw foodists. Some insist we must life a raw lifestyle so we can be as healthy as animals in the wild. Others refuse to touch honey because they consider bees an enslaved and exploited creature. They are truly annoying.